Whats a depressed persons favorite drink Depresso expresso Jk bleach
What is the worst motivational thing to say to a depressed person?
If at first you don’t succeed, try, try again.
what turns red, blue then white? the last person that I’d strangle
An American is lecturing a British person, saying things like “it’s an elevator not a lift” and “it’s chips not crisps” etc. After a while of this the British person calmly retorted “they’re schools, not shooting ranges”.
How do you get a depressed person out of a tree?
You cut the rope…
I love how in horror movies the person calls out, “Hello,” as if the psycho will answer, “Hey, what’s up, I’m in the kitchen. Want a sandwich?”
What’s the worst part about breaking up with a Japanese person
You have to drop the bomb twice before they get the message
I hate how funerals are always at 9 a.m. – I’m not really a mourning person.
If a person shoot’s a person about to commit suicide, is it making it less painful or is it murder?
Snow everywhere, it’s Christmas time. A person looks at the tree. The person: Only last thing left to hang! He grabs a noose.
Q: What is the difference between a stripper and a bungee cord?
A: It is cheap fast, and if the rubber breaks, your pretty much screwed.
The Pope and Donald Trump are on stage in front of a huge crowd.
The Pope leaned towards Trump and said, “Do you know that with one little wave of my hand I can make every person in this crowd go wild with joy? This joy will not be a momentary display, like that of your followers, but go deep into their hearts and for the rest of their lives whenever they speak of this day, they will rejoice!"
Trump replies, “I seriously doubt that. With one little wave of your hand? Show me!”
So the Pope slapped him.
why did the depressed person cross the road.
to get ran over.
Murder is the same as suicide except the other person is doing it for you
how does a crazy person get to the woods?
He takes the psychopath.
Me and a person downtown.
Person: Hey, crazy Saturday night.
Me: I guess so.
Person: Why do people do crazy stuff like this?
Me: I don’t know. I used too, but don’t anymore.
Person: why’d you stop?
Me: unfortunately, I lived every time I’d try something.
What is the difference between a suicidal person and you? None you are both dead on the inside.
Person: where do i commit sucide Dog: roof Person: good idea
30 people died in a car wreck before they got to Heaven God asked for one wish because they died in a tragic way the first lady she was obsessed with her looks so she asked to be beautiful and God granted her wish the next person didn’t know what to wish for so they wish for the same thing the guy in the very back was laughing having a grand old time then god got to the person before the last he aaid the same he wished to be beautiful when God got to the last person he said I want them all to be ugly again.
the gayest person in the world is pacman. you can pay him 50 cents to eat 200 balls.