What do you call a flat-chested depressed person?
A cutting board.
Personal Jokes
A plane is about to crash into the ocean, and the passengers are freaking out.
A woman stands up, takes off her clothes, and says, "Before I go, is there a man man enough to make me feel like a woman?"
A man stands up, takes off his shirt, and says, "Here, iron this!"
I wrote puns on a piece of paper like this:
P. P. P. P. U. U. U. U. N. N. N. N. S. S. S. S.
Then I showed them to my teacher, asking him what they had in common.
“They are all very tearable,” he replied.
Well, there is one person who gets it!
Kate: Can we have a threesome?
Trevor: Sure.
The lights go off and Trevor starts doing what he's supposed to be doing, and then he feels something going up his back end. He goes to punch the person behind him, but then he turns on the light, and it was Kate behind him, and he's been fucking the guy the whole time.
My neighbor has been mad at his wife for sunbathing nude. I personally am on the fence.
"Don't break a person's heart, they only have one."
"Yeah, break their bones instead... they have over 200 of those :)"
Why can’t a gay person walk a trail? Because a gay person can’t walk on a straight line.
What do you call a person in a wheelchair?
Virgin Mobile.
Me: Do you take milk before cereal, or cereal before milk?
The adult person I asked: Cereal?
Me: I take the bowl first! What do you do? Do you just pour everything on the table and then eat it?
The person: Yes.
Me: WHAT?!!!??!!
Okay, so I know this is not a joke, but I wanted to take some time to say if you have autism, you are still amazing. You are lovely in every way, and if people bully you, don't listen because they are wrong. You are cute, and I know how it feels. I have ADHD, and I get bullied a lot, but I don't let that get to me because I know what they are saying is wrong and not true. People with autism, stay strong; you got this. I will be your friend by heart, even if it's not in person.
Another joke, I know they suck.
What is a depressed person's favorite joke? Their life.
When an American goes on a scale, the other person will say, "I asked for your weight, not your phone number!"
Imagine if a disabled person's last name was Runner or Walker! 😬😂
Ever noticed that "lol" looks like a person drowning?
What do you call a Japanese person when their knees are cured?
"Happynese" (happy knees).
Random person: "What's one thing your ex gave you that you can't get rid of?"
Man: *Shows a picture of his child.*
One person said you are much more beautiful than Cinderella. The next day, you're in court and Cinderella is the witness.
(P.S. she was born to be a drama queen.)
What do you call a deaf person?
Whatever you want!
When a deaf person is on trial, is it really considered a hearing?
What's a smart person's favorite candy? Nerds! :D
