Personal jokes

Chuck Norris is the only man that ever had sex with my wife and survived. Oh, how did I survive?

Fortunately, being her husband, I was the one person she wasn't fucking.

What do a deaf person and an orphan have in common? Neither of them can hear their parents.

I robbed a person in a wheelchair. He cried and said: "You can run, but you can't hide." I ran, and I never saw him again.

What do cannibals call a person that is running?

Fast food.

When a person yells, just laugh and remember that they can’t hurt what’s already dead.

What do you call a night person? A night owl 🦉 who is up all night, lol!

Why did the emo person cross the road?

TO GET TO THE OTHER SIDE Haha.

Let's say I was immortal. No matter what I did, I would be alive. But, the catch is I’m the least flexible and least strong person in the world.

Now, I get my head chopped off. What would I do? I would roll over to my headless body and figure out what it's like to suck my own dick.

What do you say after making fun of a disabled person?

"Sorry, I didn't mean to step on your toes."

Guys, the person that said "suck a dick" was Mase. His real name is Mason, so ya.

Me and a wheelchair person were playing tag, and I broke my leg so it can be fair for him.

If I flip off an Asian person, he can't see it.

What do you call a white person from Africa?

Albino.

How do you find a black person in the dark without a flashlight?

Tell them a joke to make them smile.

Feeling stressed? Have a nice cup of tea and spill it in the lab of the person bothering you.

A poor person came up to me and said, "You're ugly." I said, "You remind me of Spider-Man: No Way Home."

Friend: Name one gay person off the top of your head.

Me: Me.

A blonde accidentally kills a cop and calls the police.

She exclaims, “Hello, is this 911?”

The other person, “Yes, what is your emergency?”

The blonde answered, “I called to inform you that you’re 910 now.”

How does a blind person wipe their ass?

With braille toilet paper.

What do you say to an upset Down syndrome person?

I'd ask what's up, but it's definitely not you!