A teacher asks a boy in her class “If 3 birds are sitting on a fence, and one is shot, how many are left?” The boy responds with “None.” The teacher asks why. “They would all fly away after hearing the gunshot.” The teacher says, "The answer is 2, but I like the way you think. Later, the boy asks the teacher “3 women walk out of an ice cream shop. One is eating with a spoon, one is licking it, and one is sucking it. Which one is married?” The teacher says “The one sucking it.” The boy says “No, the one wearing the ring, but I like the way you think.”
A cop sees an old woman carrying two large sacks. One of the sacks has a hole and is leaking 20 dollar bills.
The cop asks the woman, “Where did an old lady like you get all of that money?”
She replies, “Well, there’s a golf course behind my house and when golfers need to go to the bathroom, they stick their penis through a hole in my fence and pee into my yard. It became a problem because it kills the flowers.”
The cop asks, “So what did you do about it?”
The old lady says, “I get my hedge clippers and I wait behind the fence. When a golfer sticks his penis through the fence, I grab ahold of it and shout GIVE ME $20 OR IT COMES CLEAN OFF!”
“That seems fair enough,” the cop says, “so what’s in the other sack?”
The old lady replies with, “Not everyone pays…”
What happens when a cow jumps over a wire fence
Chuck Norris once took down a fence. Maybe you heard of it, the Berlin wall
Why do cemeteries have fences around them? People are dying to get in.
Q: Why did the two gate-builders start fighting? A: Because they were fencing.
I was walking by a prison when I saw a midget in an orange jumpsuit climbing down the fence. When he hit the ground and sneered at me, I said; “Well, that’s a little condescending.”
The inmates are yelling 12…12…12… in the courtyard. A man walking by is interested why the keep chanting 12…12…12… so he sticks his head through the fence and the inmate poked the man in the eye. Moments later they start chanting 13…13…13…
fence 1 - was thinking and fence 2 - said are you still on the fence about runing away. Fence 1- said yeah i was thinking of running one the RAILROAD
Why do they have fences around cemeteries? Because people are dying to get in.
Q: Why did the cow touch an electric fence?
A: Because it wanted to get electrocowted🐄
I was taking a walk near the prison when I saw a good looking guy climbing down the fence, and when he noticed me, he gave me a sneer! It was pretty condescending.
What do you call it when Portericans surround your house?
A spicket fence!
What happened when a cow jumps over a barbed wire fence, complete and utter destruction.
Q: What do you call a cow stuck on a barb wire fence?
A: Udderly destroyed
Why did the first fence hated the other fence? The second fence used some of-fensive language.
If 4 birds are sitting on a fence and one gets shot how many are there still on the fence
None the rest fly away
Why did the carrots laugh? They saw Mrs. Green Pea over the fence.
What time is it when a cow sits on your fence? Time to get a new fence!
What time is it when a rooster sits on a fence? Morning.
What time is it when an elephant sits on a fence? Time to get a new fence.
What time is it when a lawyer sits on the fence? Time for an elephant to sit on the fence.
Your dad So stupid that when he jumped Fence the gate is open
A day in the life of a Biden voter.
$2000 stimulus check? Nah, $1400…some day. No more kids in cages? Nah, more kids in cages. $15 minimum wage? Nah, $11. Maybe. 50k loan forgiveness? Nah. Lol No more deportations? Nah, they’re still leaving. Women’s rights? Nah, dudes in women’s sports. New COVID bill? Nah, mostly bailouts and pet projects. Cheap insulin? Nah, jack those prices up. Defeat fascism? Nah, barbed wire fences around DC.
What time is it when an elephant sits on your fence?
time to get a new fence.