Perception jokes

I thought I saw Jojo Siwa... no wait, it's your hairline.

What do you call a black person eating chicken, watermelon, and drinking Kool-Aid?

Reality.

Tell a woman she’s beautiful a hundred times, and she won’t believe you.

Tell a woman she’s fat once, and she will remember it for the rest of her life.

Why did Helen Keller ride a broken roller coaster?

She didn't see anything wrong with it.

My wife is like a mirror.

I can never look at it.

The optimist thinks the glass is half full. The pessimist thinks the glass is half empty. The feminist thinks the glass is raping them.

Your forehead is so big that it made Mona Lisa smile.

The saddest painting you will see is a mirror.

So, is a homosexual in a coma a fruit or a vegetable?

Why can't Helen Keller drive?

Because she's a woman.

A blind woman told me I had a big penis yesterday.

I think she was pulling my leg.

What part of the Earth does Helen Keller not have?

The sea.

If I'm ugly, why do you always look at me when I come in the door?

When deaf people see someone yawning, do they think they're screaming?

I am reading a horror book in braille.

Something bad is going to happen. I CAN FEEL IT!

What did the elephant say to the naked man?

"How do you breathe through something so small?"

What do you call Helen Keller in a pitch black, sound proof room?

Unnecessary.

Why did the legless kid think he won a race?

Because everybody already left.

When someone has an imaginary friend, you call them weird and crazy.

But when a group of people have an imaginary friend, you call it religion. :)

Is it just me, or do you kids have imaginations?