Perception jokes
I can't wait to have 2020 in my hindsight.
Me: "You wanna see my dad?"
Some kid: "Yeah?"
Me: "Close your eyes and he will appear."
Some kid: "He ain't appearing."
Me: "Sorry I thought he would appear for you. He won't appear for me."
*The kid laughs*
Moral: Not everything is supposed to be funny text if you notice what was really going on. 🙃
On the plus side, I finally hear voices talking to me... just wish they were outside my head.
What do you call the worst joke ever?
Well, according to my mom, I am.
How do you find a blind man at a nude beach?
It isn't hard.
If someone calls you dirty minded just say:
"You are dirty minded as well if you understand what I'm saying."
Dark humor is like COVID-19... Not everyone gets it.
Your reflection.
Dark humor is like water.
Not everybody gets it.
What did Stevie Wonder see when he got murdered?
Nothing.
See, morbid humor is just like water, not everyone gets it.
Why did Helen Keller's dog kill itself? I would too if all I heard was "daaaaaaah!"
Why are blind people gay?
Cause.
Kid asks, "What is dark humor?" Me *points*, "See that guy across the street..." Kid: "I can't... I'm blind." Me: "Exactly."
"You da bomb!" "No, you da bomb!"
In the US, a compliment. In the Middle East, an argument.
I was walking home when I saw children crossing the street on their own. I went towards him and tapped his shoulder and said, "Hey, little kid, you are not supposed to be walking on your own." The kid turns out to be a dwarf.
Hey, you have something on your chin, no the 3rd one down.
You wanna see a joke? Look in a mirror.
When a midget smokes weed, do they get high or medium?
Dark jokes are like water; some people just don't get it.