One jokes
What’s the difference between a gun and liberals?
Guns only have one trigger.
What do rocks and girls have in common?
The flat ones get skipped.
One day, during lunch, a Spanish kid came up to my other friend and asked her questions in Spanish, and when she was about to say something, I popped out and said, “GO AWAY OR I WILL SUE YOU WITH BRIANNA’S SEVEN/7 LAWYERS!!!!(AKA, her seven/7 shoes.)”
Random person: "What's one thing your ex gave you that you can't get rid of?"
Man: *Shows a picture of his child.*
When I hotline bling, I only need one thing.
Credit to my boy tippecanoe3 for this joke.
What do you call it when Panera isn’t hungry?
Panera fed.
Credit to RogueRobot for this one:
What does Panera sleep in?
Panera bed.
Your momma so fat when she stepped on one scale, it broke. When she got another one, it said "TBC." She looked in the mirror, it broke.
One day, a man visited an orphanage.
Then he sees a kid crying. The man asked, "Where are your parents?"
The kid cries even harder.
Why is September 11th an awesome birthday to have?
Because no one forgets it! :)
Why don't orphans play tag?
Because there's no one to catch.
What’s the difference between a basketball player and an orphan?
One has a home to run to.
Why is the white man in prison scarier than the black one?
The white one actually did it!
Heaven is like university: no one gets in.
My girlfriend left me today for spending my own money. What a bitch! I spend a fair amount of money on her for her clothes and Air Force Ones, but as soon as I spend $100 on hookers, she leaves me.
Before you leave that marriage, remember that one innocent 🐐 goat was killed for your traditional marriage. 😔
One person said you are much more beautiful than Cinderella. The next day, you're in court and Cinderella is the witness.
(P.S. she was born to be a drama queen.)
Why do orphans like families? Because they wish they had one.
Brinnia so fat when she stepped on a scale, it said, "I need a bigger one."
What does Stephen Hawking have in common with Bill Gates? One stands, the other doesn't.
If an emo counts down, don't worry, they probably have only one bullet.