One jokes

anti-bullying

-- · 4 years ago

An anti-bullying PSA and speeding PSA from the same creator meet one another.

The death toll went sky high.

Shooter

:) · 4 years ago

When the school shooter runs out of ammo: K a l m.

When he grabs a full mag: P a n i k.

When he looks back and doesn't see you, but you're hiding in one of the classrooms: K a l m.

When the autistic kid's Sketchers light up: P A N I K.

Fish

Anonymous · 8 years ago

What do you call a fish with no eye?

A one-eyed fish, you smart ass!

Band

Anonymous · 5 years ago

These three men wanted to start a band. One had the idea to call them the Rolling Stones, one wanted to call them the Veggies, the other said, "Let's be the Cripples," as they all rolled away.

Three nuns died in a car crash. They went up to heaven at the pearly gates. The gatekeeper said, "This really should not have happened, so I am going to send you back to earth as different people. Tell me who you want to be or look like." The first nun said, "I want to look like Madonna." Puff, you look like her now, but you can’t use her name. And sent her down to earth. The second one said, "I want to look like Marilyn Monroe." He then makes her look like her and sends her down to earth. The third nun said, "I want to look like Sarah Pipalini." The gatekeeper says to her, "Sarah Pipalini, who is that?" She gives the gatekeeper a newspaper article. He reads it, shakes his head no, and says, "It’s not Sarah Pipalini, it's Sahara pipeline laid by 500 men."

Moral

Heroin Monkey · 2 years ago

The image shows a tumblr post discussing the moral of Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer. The first comment states, "The moral of Rudolph the Red nose reindeer is that no one likes you unless you're useful." The second comment says, "Rudolph the red-nosed reindeer as capitalist propaganda: discuss." The third comment argues, "Rudolph was already exactly as useful as the other reindeer. The moral is deviation from the norm will be punished unless it is exploitable."

One memes

Alcohol

Michael · 5 years ago

Little Johnny was walking down an alley and saw a lamp. After he rubbed it, a genie came out and said, "You have 10 seconds to have one wish." Little Johnny says he wants to pee alcohol. The genie grants his wish. He tells his family, and his sister doesn't believe it. After having a drink, she says, "We should have this every night!" Little Johnny gets two cups every night, one for him and his sister. He does the same thing for four nights. Eventually, he ran out of cups and has one left. He gives it to himself, and his sister asks, "Where's my cup?" Little Johnny replied, "You're drinking out of the bottle tonight."