One jokes
Two flies were playing football in a saucer. One tells the other, “You’ll need more practice if you want to play in the cup!”
Two scientists walk into a bar. The first one says, "Can I have a drink of H2O?" Then the second says, "Can I have a drink of H2O2?" and he dies.
The lunch lady gave me only one carrot. I didn't carrot all.
Viagra is a lot like amusement parks...
It's a one hour wait, for a two-minute ride.
How many psychologists does it take to change a light bulb?
It only takes one, but it takes a long time, and the light bulb has to want to change.
What is the difference between an orphan and a candle?
One is used.
What's the difference between a newborn baby and an orphan after a rugby match?
They both come out bloody and crying, but at least one gets picked up.
If an orphan wants food, who does it? No one. Everybody just watches him starve because they couldn't find his parents.
Africa has every type of gun but one...
A water gun.
They say one man's trash is another man's treasure. That's why orphanages exist!
I come in from work to see my wife dead on the sofa. As I unzip for one last ride, she says, "BOO!" What kind of a dick fuck does that!
Farrah Fawcett, upon arriving at the pearly gates, God asked her, for having led such an honest life, to grant her one wish. Farrah simply requested that the children of the world would be safe.
Five hours later, Michael Jackson died.
There was a kid being mean to another kid at an orphanage. The kid said, "Stop!" but the mean one said, "What are you going to do? Call your mommy?"
One day in Roblox, someone was arguing with me, and they asked me my age. "18." They said that they were twenty-two.
Me: "If you're so smart, what's the largest daycare game on Roblox?"
Him: "Yo Hair," he said. Then he left the game, and I said, "That is so messed up. Actually, that's bullcrap."
Dumb person: Wat idk mean?
Person 1: I don’t know.
Dumb one: Oh u don’t know okie I ask Googol.
Person 1: Wait idk means--
Dumb one (to Googol): WAT DOS IDK MANNN?
Googol: I don’t know.
Dumb one: OH ME GOOOD EVEN GOGLO DOESYN KNOWWW
One time Michael Jackson had an allergic reaction from eating 12-year-old nuts.
People were deciding how to punish a terrible criminal, and one man came up with a great idea.
He sat him in a movie theater with no food at all and made him watch a 12 hour documentary about the country Hungary.
I fucked your mom, oh wait, you don't have one.
What did one aborted baby say to the other? Nothing. They're both dead.
What is the one word orphans don’t know? Homework.