Worst Jokes Ever
Spell "IOUT", no space.
How many cats are in the human body?
None, unless you're Asian.
Love is like a fart. If you have to force it, it's probably shit.
/setblock minecraft_morbid_joke
/playsound pained_laugh
I will tell you a story. There was a fruit named Pear who was named Dyck. He one day met his friend Carrot, who was later killed after being stuck into some girl's vagina.
Pear then became very sadistic and no one loved him, and he became mentally fruit-pressed. One day he met a Banana named Harvey Weinstein, and they got married and had children who were all named Minion. Eventually, the rest of his family died, and Pear was left slowly rotting away. His last words were, "I have finally 'peared' the consequences of all my actions."
Fruit is like life. You slowly eat it away as it slowly also begins to rot like everyone I’ve known.
What's the difference between an in-law and an outlaw?
An outlaw is wanted.
I told you ten puns to make you laugh, and I do not pun in-ten-did.
Mÿ pp.
When two wheelchairs hit each other, is it a fender bender?
It turns out a major new study recently found that humans eat more bananas than monkeys.
It’s true. I can’t remember the last time I ate a monkey.
I’ll never forget my Granddad’s last words to me just before he died.
“Are you still holding the ladder?”
"Knock Knock!" "Who's there?" "It's Dave!"
"Dave who?"
Dave bursts into tears, realizing that his grandmother's Alzheimers has progressed to the point where she no longer remembers him.
One man's trash is another man's treasure.
Wonderful saying, horrible way to find out you were adopted.
I was digging in our garden when I found a chest completely full of gold coins.
I was about to run straight home to tell my wife about it, but then I remembered why I was digging in our garden.
My wife and I have reached the difficult decision that we do not want children.
If anybody does, please just send me your contact details, and we can drop them off tomorrow.
I asked a pretty, young homeless woman if I could take her home. She smiled at me and said yes.
The look on her face soon changed, however, when I walked away with her cardboard box.
In the average room, there are about 2,894,638 items that Chuck Norris can use to kill you, including the room itself.
What's the difference between a blonde and a bowling ball?
I can only fit three fingers inside the bowling ball.
What do you call a PEIS?