Movie jokes
Rachel won the lottery twice in two years. Her friend Jim called her every day asking for tips on winning, just the same. Then one day, simply to get rid of him, Rachel said, "Watch two martial arts movies, eat three pieces of hard beef jerky, and pick a fight at a bar."
Jim replied with a shocked look, "That's what I do after Mr. Tugman shakes my hand too long."
What do Stephen Hawking and the Wicked Witch have in common?
If you throw water over them, they both die...
Batman vs Superman?
Your mamma so fat Thanos had to clap 4 times.
Anyone else think High School Musical would have been a better film with a school shooter?
Why can't an orphan role-play Star Wars?
Because they have no one to play Darth Vader.
What movie do orphans hate? The Fast and the Furious.
You're so fat, Thanos had to snap three times to destroy you.
What do you call Cap and Spider-Man? Spider-America!
"Cancer isn't real. It's probably special effects."
Why do orphans like the movie Home Alone?
Because they're home alone themselves!
Q: What’s Jackie Chan‘s favorite drink to have at a bar?
A: Wo-Tah!
"Morbius" is a bad movie (jokey).
What did Nemo say to the emo?
"Be careful, you can't Nemo your way out of emo."
Hey, if you've watched Twilight with Edward, Bella, and Jacob, then here's something for you.
Do you think Bella should have gotten with Jacob? I think she should have, ngl.
Face the truth, Jake could have went on the door, but Rose wanted him to die.
What do you call James Bond in a bathtub?
Bubble 007.
Why do orphans love Dom Toretto?
Because "family is everything!"
Uma Thurman in "Pulp Fiction" was very kind and possibly the sweetest character, unless you count her forehead as of now.
What’s an autistic person's favorite movie:
A Quiet Place?