Make jokes

The other day I went on a romantic cruise in Hawaii. Then I met my girl Zendaya on board. She was shaking her ass and playing with her penis. Then she asked me, "Hey, you wanna make love in the cabin?" I said, "Sure, sweet thang," gave me her number, kissed me on the cheek. Next day she woke up because it was a romantic nightmare.

Dark humor and women are very similar...

Not everyone appreciates them, but they both give everyone something to make fun of.

I congratulated my friend on losing all that baby weight. She started crying and told me I should make them for miscarriage like that......

I would make a disabled joke.

But they never work.

People should've recognized that Jared Fogle was a sick offender by one coded Subway sandwich; he normally claimed to kids he ate the sweet onion chicken teriyaki when it was the tuna sub.

Tuna sub was the message of the target to the kid since "tuna sub" put together makes "tunasub" and the truth comes when you spell it in reverse ("busanut")!

In a Catholic school cafeteria, a nun places a note in front of a pile of apples, "Only take one. God is watching." Further down the line is a pile of cookies. A little boy makes his own note, "Take all you want. God is watching the apples."

What is the difference between a nun and a hooker?

One makes you believe in Heaven, the other makes you feel it.

I tried to make a pun about cheese, but I couldn't think of any good "whey" to do it.

If anyone ever makes a time machine, please make a bunker for Hitler/the Nazis and send them to 2050. I want to see who would die first, future us or them.

Everyone tells me I need to stop making prostitute jokes.

I guess they're whore-ible.

Scientists make skyscrapers and airplanes.

Religion crashes them.

What’s big, pink, long and makes my 12 year old girlfriend cry when I put it in her mouth?

Her miscarriage.

Why can't depressed people make depression jokes? Because they can't talk if they are dead.

Ring.. Ring.. Yes this is Dave from the Orphanage, "you make 'em we take 'em", how may I be of service?

Chuck Norris makes the living room the dying room!

Kid 1: Guys, stop making 9/11 jokes. My dad died in 9/11.

Kid 2: Sorry, I didn't know.

Kid 1: He was the best fighter pilot in all of Saudi Arabia.

A handicapped person was making fun of me, so I walked away.

I'd make a masturbation joke.

But they always get out of hand.

Whenever I make a 9/11 joke, it bombs.

Thank you so much for helping me get to 20 followers! I'm so happy, every time I look at my followers going up, it makes me so happy. I can't wait to keep posting other things on here! <3