Make jokes

If I could make someone tell me their last words, they'd say, "Make me."

What's the best part about duck tape?

It turns "No, no, no!" into "Mmmm, mmmmm, mmmmm!"

It makes it real easy to get to home base on that first date, too.

I'm gonna make a documentary about meth-addicted prostitutes.

I think I'll call it "Whores on Ice."

Mother: "Sweetie, make a Christmas wish."

Girl: "I wish that Santa will send some clothes to those naked girls in papa's computer."

The other day I went on a romantic cruise in Hawaii. Then I met my girl Zendaya on board. She was shaking her ass and playing with her penis. Then she asked me, "Hey, you wanna make love in the cabin?" I said, "Sure, sweet thang," gave me her number, kissed me on the cheek. Next day she woke up because it was a romantic nightmare.

I congratulated my friend on losing all that baby weight. She started crying and told me I should make them for miscarriage like that......

I would make a disabled joke.

But they never work.

Dark humor and women are very similar...

Not everyone appreciates them, but they both give everyone something to make fun of.

People should've recognized that Jared Fogle was a sick offender by one coded Subway sandwich; he normally claimed to kids he ate the sweet onion chicken teriyaki when it was the tuna sub.

Tuna sub was the message of the target to the kid since "tuna sub" put together makes "tunasub" and the truth comes when you spell it in reverse ("busanut")!

I'd make a masturbation joke.

But they always get out of hand.

Why can't depressed people make depression jokes? Because they can't talk if they are dead.

Thank you so much for helping me get to 20 followers! I'm so happy, every time I look at my followers going up, it makes me so happy. I can't wait to keep posting other things on here! <3

What’s big, pink, long and makes my 12 year old girlfriend cry when I put it in her mouth?

Her miscarriage.

Yo mama is so fat that Naruto couldn’t make enough shadow clones to surround her.

Chuck Norris makes the living room the dying room!

Ring.. Ring.. Yes this is Dave from the Orphanage, "you make 'em we take 'em", how may I be of service?

Whenever I make a 9/11 joke, it bombs.

Why would Tommy kill Philza's wife just to make Phil believe she didn't exist?

LIKE AND SUB IF YOU LI/j

Kid 1: Guys, stop making 9/11 jokes. My dad died in 9/11.

Kid 2: Sorry, I didn't know.

Kid 1: He was the best fighter pilot in all of Saudi Arabia.

My parents telling me: "What doesn't kill you makes you stronger."

Me upset about my suicide attempt doesn't succeed.