Suicide attempt jokes
I believe "Self-Baptism" is a nice way of saying "Failed Suicide Attempt."
There's nothing more depressing than a failed suicide attempt.
So you're in a hospital, you barely survive your suicide attempt. You see one of the scalpels, you finish the job.
Things I would’ve missed if my suicide attempt didn’t fail in 2020.
My attempt in 2021.
And my attempt this year.
There's nothing more depressing than a failed suicide attempt.
What caused the Great Depression? A lack of comedians.
My parents telling me: "What doesn't kill you makes you stronger."
Me upset about my suicide attempt doesn't succeed.
Being asked for advice after a failed suicide attempt:
"What advice do you have for people out there?"
As a suicide professional, don't try this at home.
Heyyy, in the last six months, [I had] 4 suicide attempts, broke up with 3 girls, and my mom went on drugs.
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Extremely depressing poem I wrote last year when I tried to kill myself
They were an inch wide and a centimeter deep But I don’t remember the length As I passed out in fear I remember staying pure Not being afraid of what I could do But I broke that years ago Last year, they used to be a millimeter wide and a nanometer deep An inch long I cried yet it wasn’t enough for me I remember being hot The wool sweater w… Read more
Ok, I need to make some things straight. This site has gone into chaos because of this stupid stuff that’s been going on, so right now I’m only gonna tell the facts. No stupid false stuff, no fluff, nothing. You guys need to understand what happened. A week ago, I attempted scuicide by overdose via Benadryl and a mix of other random opioids. This was around 7:55 AM EST. I passed out, making a big banging sound, awak… Read more
Ways I almost died (in order)
-Almost got attacked by large snake -Almost shot by gun in my head (I believe an event like that would make me more open minded) -Caught GOKART on fire and flipped it over while I was in it -Suicide attempt #1 -#2 -#3 -#4 -#5