Make jokes
How do you make a handkerchief dance?
You put a little boogie in it.
I’d make a joke to Fetty Wap on this, but there’s only a 50/50 chance he’ll SEE this.
How do you make a hotdog stand? You take away its chair.
Q: The person who makes it doesn't say what it is.
The person who receives it doesn't know what it is.
The person who knows what it is doesn't want it.
What am I?
A: A baby.
Enough with the Hitler jokes. They make me Fuhrer-ious!
Memes
Im still alive and im going to make it everyones problem
Your mum is so ugly she could make an onion cry.
I make weed disappear, what's your superpower?
An eye for an eye will make the whole world blind...
...but it will allow ugly people to get laid.
Why aren’t Make-A-Wish kids allowed to fly?
Because they rarely make it out of the terminal.
What’s the hardest part about making vegetable soup?
To put the wheelchair in the pot.
If I make you breakfast in bed, a simple 'thank you' is all I need.
Not all this 'How did you get in my house?' business.
How do you stop all homophobic heterosexual white men from using all public men's restrooms at a rest area?
Make sure that all public men's restrooms at the rest area are always occupied with gay men that have long and thick big cocks, regardless of skin color.
I really used to be into emo chicks. Now they just don't make the cut.
Mother: "Sweetie, make a Christmas wish."
Girl: "I wish that Santa will send some clothes to those naked girls in papa's computer."
I thought about making a necrophilia joke, but I knew it would be a DOA.
What is the worst part about making an Asian girl squirt?
She charges you for extra sauce!
What kind of animal makes a good bottle opener?
A male Duck on Viagra.
How do you make a baby survive a fall of over 300 metres?
I don't know. I've dropped dozens off the Empire State Building and none have lived.
The other day I went on a romantic cruise in Hawaii. Then I met my girl Zendaya on board. She was shaking her ass and playing with her penis. Then she asked me, "Hey, you wanna make love in the cabin?" I said, "Sure, sweet thang," gave me her number, kissed me on the cheek. Next day she woke up because it was a romantic nightmare.
Dark humor and women are very similar...
Not everyone appreciates them, but they both give everyone something to make fun of.