Handicap jokes
What do you call a pool full of handicapped people?
Vegetable soup.
Hot women with big boobs work at Hooters, but where does a handicap woman work?
IHOP.
I lost a race with a handicapped person today. The problem was the race was all stairs.
Gravity sure is fast.
I was in a public bathroom in a handicap stall, and when I got out, a handicapped man told me that I was an a**hole. I told him, "Bet you won't stand up and say that to my face," and then he broke down.
Michael Jackson and Tonya Harding got together back in the day for a horse racing venture. Tonya says, "I'll handle the handicapping, you go ride the 3-year-olds."
What’s the worst song to play in front of a vegetable? “James Brown - Get on Up”
What’s the worst song to play in front of a handicapped kid? “Van Halen - Jump”
What's the worst song to play in front of a black man in Minneapolis? “I Can't Breathe - Juice Wrld”
I always win arguments against my handicapped girlfriend; she can't stand for herself.
Why do you call a man that is physically handicapped and German?
A physically handicapped bisexual man that is promiscuous and German.
What do you call a gay man that is not physically handicapped that performs blowjobs on gay men that are physically handicapped?
Caregiver.
What do you call physically handicapped, homophobic, heterosexual men and women in wheelchairs?
Mixed nuts.
A conman, a mentally handicapped person, and a Russian spy walk into a bar.
And the bartender asks, "What will it be, Mr. President?"
What did the blind, deaf, mentally handicapped orphan get for Christmas?
Cancer.
I like my women how I like my golf score: low in the 80s and with a handicap.
A handicapped person was making fun of me, so I walked away.
I always park in handicapped spaces at the hospital.
Just to test their patients.
Handicapped jokes are so cruel.
I can't stand them!
What is meals on wheels to a Christian nationalist that is also a conservative Republican politician, a gay man in a wheelchair that is poor and also physically handicapped, and who is also well-endowed?
What do physically handicapped gay men do after they are done belching? They wipe their mouths on their light blue handkerchiefs after they are done sucking cocks.
Did you ever receive an anonymous blowjob from another male under the handicapped stall inside the public men's restroom at a rest area and did you have an orgasm and was it the best orgasm that you ever had?
Why is parking a car like finding a girlfriend?
All the good ones are taken, so you stick it in the disabled one and hope nobody notices.