Handicap jokes
What do you call a pool full of handicapped people?
Vegetable soup.
Handicapped jokes are so cruel.
I can't stand them!
A handicapped person was making fun of me, so I walked away.
I always win arguments against my handicapped girlfriend; she can't stand for herself.
I always park in handicapped spaces at the hospital.
Just to test their patients.
Hot women with big boobs work at Hooters, but where does a handicap woman work?
IHOP.
A conman, a mentally handicapped person, and a Russian spy walk into a bar.
And the bartender asks, "What will it be, Mr. President?"
I lost a race with a handicapped person today. The problem was the race was all stairs.
Gravity sure is fast.
Why did the paraplegic cross the road?
Because they didn't have any handicapped parking spots on his side.
Michael Jackson and Tonya Harding got together back in the day for a horse racing venture. Tonya says, "I'll handle the handicapping, you go ride the 3-year-olds."
What's the difference between a wanted person and a wanted handicapped person? The handicapped person wasn’t last seen on foot.
What do you call a legless cow?
Handicapped and stupid and monke and food.
What’s the worst song to play in front of a vegetable? “James Brown - Get on Up”
What’s the worst song to play in front of a handicapped kid? “Van Halen - Jump”
What's the worst song to play in front of a black man in Minneapolis? “I Can't Breathe - Juice Wrld”
What would you rather be, emo or handicapped?
Trick question, emo is a handicap.
What is meals on wheels to a Christian nationalist that is also a conservative Republican politician, a gay man in a wheelchair that is poor and also physically handicapped, and who is also well-endowed?
I was in a public bathroom in a handicap stall, and when I got out, a handicapped man told me that I was an a**hole. I told him, "Bet you won't stand up and say that to my face," and then he broke down.
Why do you call a man that is physically handicapped and German?
A physically handicapped bisexual man that is promiscuous and German.
What do you call a gay man that is not physically handicapped that performs blowjobs on gay men that are physically handicapped?
Caregiver.
I don't laugh at Trump.
I was taught to NEVER make fun of the mentally handicapped.
What's the hardest part about making vegetable stew?
Trying to get the wheelchair to fit into the pot.