Where do you find a dog with no arms or legs?
Where you left it.
What do you call pedophiles on a beach? Pedos in Speedos.
Where did Janet go during the bombing? Everywhere.
Q: Where do you find a quadriplegic?
A: Right where you left 'em.
A man walks into a bar with a parrot on his shoulder. The bartender asks, "Where'd you get that lovely thing?"
"Africa," the parrot replied.
Why did the girl study in the tree? She wanted a higher education.
Where did Lucy go after the bombing?
Everywhere.
Where were the first orange trees 🍊🌳 planted?
In Orange County.
After an intense workout, I finally have the body I've always dreamed of.
It's in my basement.
I saw my wife at the dam yesterday, which sucks because I wanted her to flow further down.
You know that at Walmart they have backpacks next to the guns? Well, I thought that it was nice to see the bags next to the school supplies.
What happens when you are playing Undertale, but it's snowy in town? It SNOWED in town!
Your hair is so far back, you left it at your last address.
Virginia is false advertising. Couldn't find many virgins there.
A man hit a woman with his car, who is wrong?
The man, because you can’t drive into the kitchen.
A guy walks to his friend's house. His friend asks, "Where is your girlfriend?"
The guy replies, "Meet me at the cemetery in a week, and you'll find out!"
What's the difference between a dirty bus station and a lobster with breast implants?
One is a crusty bus station, and the other is a busty crustacean.
Where do Down syndrome kids go shopping downtown?
I just finished my fourth round of baby back ribs. For some reason, everyone else at the abortion center is staring at me.
A man was walking with a young boy in the woods.
The boy looks at the man and says, "Mister, it's too dark and I'm getting scared."
The man replies with, "How do you think I feel? I have to come back alone!"
