Like jokes
I would like to call you as dumb as a rock, but they can hold a door open.
90% of women don't like men in pink shirts. Ironically, 90% of men in pink shirts don't like women.
Doctor, doctor! I feel like a pair of curtains! Well, pull yourself together, then.
Doctor, doctor! My brother's crazy! He thinks he's a chicken. Is he egging around? Yes, but we need to get the eggs.
Woman: Doctor, doctor! I keep thinking I'm an elephant! Doctor: Run around the room. Then the woman stomps around the room and breaks things.
Doctor, doctor! I fell like a bell! Shall I ring you, then? When can you ring me up?
Doctor, doctor! I have a ball stuck in my throat! Shall I bat it and get a run, then?
An alligator is in a class, turns out he likes teaching!
Why do orphans like Spider-Man?
'Cause they really enjoy Far From Home and No Way Home. Damn, was he mad about Spider-Man Homecoming!
I like my women how I like my bacon.
Well Dunn!!!
A bear is like your best mate, Harry.
If you stab them, they die from a stab wound.
Like if you think oily men are hot.
She asked me if I was hung like a horse, but I said no.
I'm hung like a person who wants to die, but then the rope broke.
What's an orphan's least favorite show? Family Guy ;)
It’s not like they can watch it anyway: it’s PG.
I like my vegetables like I like my women: forgotten at the bottom of my freezer.
Ben Inkster, more like gay.
Why are female pornstars like Krispy Kreme donuts?
Because they get glazed on both sides.
Why are hurricanes like women? Because they come into your life, take nearly everything, and leave.
Hello, I am School Shooter Memes. For the last month I made School Shooter Jokes on the site, so now I want you guys to vote for the best one. It will be in a quarterfinal format with the 8 of them being the most liked. I will link all of the polls in the comments so make sure to vote for your favourite joke.
Bell is so ugly, she acts like a boy.
Q. Which game does necro like the most?
Into the dead part 1.
So my ex, who wouldn't leave me alone because she thought I was the best person in the world even though Will has a better haircut than me, but anyway, when we broke up she said I was the worst person she ever met, and I told her she looks like a cross between a beaver and a mole rat.
Then I told her she has the Wendy's logo haircut and then some other things I'm not gonna say. 2 years of bullshit, I was done.
Anyways, she cried lol.
Hey Hunter, Thomas here.
Why did the plane cross the road?
To get to the other side.
Thanks guys, remember to like it, means a lot!
If this gets 10 comments (I don't care about likes) I will write a four page essay and post it, and it's up to you guys what it's about.