Life jokes
Why does this exist?
Roses are red, Violets are fine. Why is your life So much better than mine?
Bro told me this when he passed away.
I’m “Fading.”
Every time you feel lucky to have your mother in your life, what should you tell her?
I really hit the mother lode with you!
My father always used to say:
"What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger."
Until the accident.
"Our teen has decreed we are the 'Worst Parents Ever.' We will hold our coronation ceremony to accept this honor next Friday. Invitations to follow."
What has 2 arms but no legs?
A crippled woman with no more meaning in her life.
Imagine playing Subway Surfers in real life.
The creator's son tried that!
(My friends said to post this. I accept no responsibility.)
When people ask my age, this is what I do.
“🥱 I DON’T CARE.... ÆAHAHAHAHAHAÆAAÆ!”
Why can't you fool an aborted baby?
Because it wasn't born yesterday.
I hope Death is a woman.
That way, it will never come for me.
At one point in your life, you were exactly pi years old.
What are emo kids' least favorite lollies?
Life Savers.
I just wanted to say to never let go of family; they are everything. Never let anyone walk all over you. And if you are with me, like this quote.
you play gatcha life more like go get a life.
I'm at my happiest point in life. I'm dating someone that's autistic, and I was just saying I needed someone special in my life.
A note for my old English Teacher:
Mr. Colin, who loves making a din, He thinks everyone loves him, but little does he know, That's not what everyone shows, About his life he ploughs and ploughs, About his dog Bella and his relationship woes... Mr. Colin, we do not care, When you speak, our minds are not there, Your life you have unnecessarily shared, When we see you, our eyesight is impaired... Mr. Colin, rumbling about his exceptions, Just when someone puts something in the bin, Or chatters to someone, not even causing a din, But Mr. Colin, drinking too much gin, Will flail all his annoying attention on him, He'll push his limits, right to the rim...
And just how I love flan! Oh, he's finally gone!
Finally my father came early from office today. I am very happy.
He was fired from his job.
Dark humor is like having parents, not everybody gets them.
Remember kids, if you're in a big problem, yell SHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEËEEEEEEEEĒEEEEĘEEEEEEEEESH!