Law jokes
What does Santa Claus and Bill Cosby have in common?
They both come while you’re asleep.
If a pregnant lady murders someone, does the child get an assist?
I taped a picture of Bill Cosby to my gun, now it's an assault rifle.
My friends in my friend group say that I am quiet and I don't do anything bad. I proved them wrong by murdering the leader of it.
Why can't antelopes get married?
Because they can't elope.
What did the ferret say after his family was questioned by police?
It's none of your business!
"Bippity Boppity Boop! Bill Cosby's coming for you!"
What's a convict's favorite song?
"I want to break free."
A man walks into a bar. The corrections officer says, "Usually we open the cell before you go in, now stop bleeding on my floor!"
What do you call a paraplegic cannibal?
"Dine and dash."
Did you hear what happened to Lorainna Bobbit? She was in an accident on the Garden State Parkway. She told the State Police Officer, "That some dick cut her off."
Imagine playing Subway Surfers in real life.
The creator's son tried that!
(My friends said to post this. I accept no responsibility.)
What do you call a nut that screws and then bolts?
An escapee from a mental hospital.
Why do they call them a nonce?
Because they go for people who don't have any sense.
Poultry rape is no joke. It is God's gift to those who want a laugh.
I find it interesting that if you rearrange the letters in the word “Mother-in-law” you get the words “Woman Hitler”.
POV: Me going to jail after giving the orphan kid a computer without the motherboard.
"Officer, don’t arrest me, she said she was 5 in dog years!"
What do you call a group of jumping Mexicans?
Border hoppers! LOL.
Why do orphans become criminals?
To know what it’s like to be wanted.