Language jokes
"Knock knock."
"Who's there?"
"Dishes."
"Dishes who?"
"Dishes a bad joke."
If you take a cap off a bottle, is it decapitation?
What’s the point in a cow going to the cinema? To be a-moo-sed!
I have a joke about paper. It's tearable.
If a bike is also called a bicycle, then what is a test also called?
A tEsTiClE!
Are you sad? Then don't be sad, because sad backwards is das, and das no good.
What do you call a disabled Chinese person?
Sum Ting Wong.
Hey dude, can you spell IHOP?
Sure, man. I. H. O. P.
Wait, you ate my pee!!!
Why were there so many victims in the Grenfell flat fire disaster in London?
All the exit signs were in English.
If you're American when you go in the bathroom and you're American when you come out, what are you in the bathroom?
European.
What is a leaf mixed with mud called? Ligma.
Ligma balls!
GOTTVERDAMMT, Hans! I said, "Glass of juice," not "Gas the Jews!"
Knock knock.
"Who's there?"
Boo.
"Boo who?"
It's just a joke, no need to cry!
Why do they call it emotion when the root word is emo, but emos don't show emotion?
Did you know that the "f" in "orphans" means family?
The F in orphan stands for family.
Wait, there is no F. (F)
Person: Why? You: No.
There was once a Spanish magician. He said, "Uno, dos..." and he disappeared without a tres.
Q. What do you call a bear with no teeth?
A. A gummy bear.
Is it possible to stutter in sign language?
Yes, it’s called Parkinson’s.