Language jokes
Dick.
Why shouldn’t you call people in China?
Because there are so many Wings and Wongs you might "wing" the wrong number.
What did the mama moose say to the calf after it got on her nerves?
"I'm not a-moosed right now."
What do you call a premature Chinese baby birth? Wong Tai-Ming.
My three favorite things are eating my family and not using commas.
Memes
Did you know that the letter "f" in "orphan" stands for family?
The "F" in "orphan" stands for family, but there is no "F" in "orphan."
What is Juan the junkmail dispenser's nickname? Spic and spam.
What do you call a surprised Chinese man?
Answer: Ho Lee Fuk.
READ THIS OUT LOUD:
This is this cat.
This is is cat.
This is how cat.
This is to cat.
This is keep cat.
This is an cat.
This is idiot cat.
This is a busy cat.
This is for cat.
This is forty cat this is seconds cat.
NOW- go back and read the third word from each line from the start.
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Fuck.
Fuck who?
Fuck off!
What language do Asian Karen’s speak?
Demandarin.
You know, they didn't add the word "retard" into the dictionary for nothing.
Why can't you hear a psychiatrist using the bathroom?
Because the "p" is silent.
Today, I invented a new word: "plagiarism."
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Robin.
Robin who?
Robin you, that is who.
What does a stick say when it falls down? "Wood you help me up?"
Q. You know what really bugs me?
A. Insect puns.
I tried out some puns to make people laugh, but no pun in ten did.
"Knock, knock."
"Who's there?"
"Who."
"Who who?"
"Why are you who-ing like an owl?"