Language jokes
Do no doctor start with A and A+?
I can't handle these puns...
But I can HAND you some puns!
Budum tiss!
I took my pony to the vet because I thought he was making a funny noise when he neighed. The vet said everything was okay and he was just a little horse.
Q: What's a conspiracy theorist's favorite letter? A: Q.
It's a little known fact that Helen Keller was against teaching deaf people sign language and thought they should be forced to use oral language.
Weird.
Last time I forced somebody into oral, I got arrested.
You know what's REALLY "Ironic"?
Answer:
These REALLY ARE the "Worst Jokes" I've ever heard!
American-accented, British pronunciation, what am I?
Either Canadian or European.
I had sex with my German girlfriend; it was kinda weird though. She kept yelling her age. I don't know why.
Spell "attic."
Okay. A-T-T-I-C. /a titi/ tata. I see.
Why do you stink?
Because you haven't showered, tu, perro.
Say "I hate happiness" without the "hs".
What did the Chinese guy say to the Italian guy?
同性恋球蜥蜴 (translate it)
Le fish de la toilette.
[Plays french music]
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Owl.
Owl who?
Who? Are you meant to ask "who?"
What do you call 2 wings and a halo?
A Chinese phone call: "Wing wing halo!" 🤪
Mike Oxlong: What's deez, Mike?
Mike Oxsmall: I dunno. What is deez?
Mike Oxlong: DEEZ NUTS! HA, GOT 'EM!
Hey! Some idiot drew a cat on this pillar! Wait... does that make it a caterpillar?
Me: Knock knock.
Some dude on the street: Who's there?
Me: Whowhowho.
Dude: Whowhowho who?
Whowhowhowhowhowhowhowhowhowhowhowhowho.
Why is 69 annoying me? Oh, it's a tease.
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Control freak.
Con...
Ok, now you say, "Control freak who?"