Language jokes
I can't handle these puns...
But I can HAND you some puns!
Budum tiss!
American-accented, British pronunciation, what am I?
Either Canadian or European.
It's a little known fact that Helen Keller was against teaching deaf people sign language and thought they should be forced to use oral language.
Weird.
Last time I forced somebody into oral, I got arrested.
I took my pony to the vet because I thought he was making a funny noise when he neighed. The vet said everything was okay and he was just a little horse.
Q: What's a conspiracy theorist's favorite letter? A: Q.
What is an orange?
World's only not rhyming thing. Hehhhehehehehhe.
Cock.
Ha ha ha, kya bath hai.
What is your name?
What is your favorite name?
Amy has.
Me say, "Crack my finger."
My hubby crack my finger.
Now say it backwards.
Hey! Some idiot drew a cat on this pillar! Wait... does that make it a caterpillar?
I had a friend named Wemiyoe... We call him "we me you."
Why is 69 annoying me? Oh, it's a tease.
Me: Knock knock.
Some dude on the street: Who's there?
Me: Whowhowho.
Dude: Whowhowho who?
Whowhowhowhowhowhowhowhowhowhowhowhowho.
Knock, knock. Who's there? Dishes. Dishes who? Dishes a very bad joke!
The Past, Present & Future walked into a bar.
It was tense!
Why did you say not to?
Dad: My kid just said "butch," but since he is a kid, he said a bad word on accident.
*The next day*
Uncle: F*CK!
You know why seven ate nine? Because 7, 8, 9.