Language jokes

When my friend says I suck at something, I'm like, "U swallow."

The past, present, and future walked into a bar. It was tense.

That was a horrible pun. You should be sent to the PUN-itentiary!

Y'know what rhymes with clash, zoom, dang?

Slash, boom, bang, snap.

Bum.

What did the author say when he got a correct answer? "I got it right!"

Look at my name and you'll see.

So 666-3629, so get it?

Once, there was a kid named Cale, but his classmates didn’t know it was spelled with a “C,” so they asked him if he could be their snack.

What do you call someone with one arm and no legs?

Names.

Fuck off!

You can't spell "Funeral" without "fun."

Out of a total population of 1.3 billion, no one in Africa actually speaks "African."

A guy told me, "Nothing rhymes with orange."

So I replied, "No, it doesn't."

I am sorry, but I need some text to work with. Please provide the text from the comments section so I can generate the JSON data for you.

I asked a Chinese girl her number, she said "Sex, sex, sex, free sex tonight." I said, "Wow!"

Her friend corrected her by saying, "She means: 666-3629."

You.

What is a pirate's favorite letter? You might think it’s the "R," but it’s actually the "C".

I am Asian.

I am so Asian my pronouns are: heeEEE/Ya.

Me: Spell "I cup."

My Friend: I see you pee.

Me: BOII YOU BETTER GIVE MEH SOME PRIVACY IN MY BATH ROOM!!!!

My Friend: Oh hehe O-O