Kill

Kill jokes

Allergy

    • I know this isn't an orphan joke, but I didn't know where to say it, so yeah.

    I threw a nut at the allergy table and screamed, "YES, TRIPLE KILL!"

  • 3

    • Asteroid

    • When an asteroid is coming to kill us all:

    98.9% of the population: OMG, we're all gonna die!

    1% of the population: Eh... I never had any friends anyway.

    Alia: ROLL THE INTRO!

  • 1

    • Emo

    • What's the most common thing between Hitler and an emo?

    Hitler knows when to kill himself!

  • 2
    • Kill memes

    Killer

    • A killer gone up to 5 people and killed 4 of them. There were 2 couples and 1 third wheel. The 5th one was left single out...

  • 0

    • Vampire

    • I killed 5 zombies and stabbed a vampire with a steak, and then I started to wonder why they were carrying bags of candy.

  • 0

    • Titanic

    • The ocean will kill you to death expensively if you're on Titanic. Buying the tickets was a waste of money.

  • 1

    • Snail

    • One day, a snail got robbed by two turtles.

    The cops arrived and arrested the woman for killing her cheating husband, and the son was sent to child services. (Moral - no one cares about the frkn snail and turtles!)

  • 1

    • Grandma

    • The other day while I was going down on my grandma, I thought I tasted a little horse semen and I got to wondering if maybe that’s what killed her!

  • 0

    • Pregnancy

    • What's the same between a pregnant 14 year old and her fetus? They're both saying "Oh my god, my mom's gonna kill me!"

  • 0