Kid Jokes

Bob, why are you kicking the kids?

What, it's not like they have a home to go to.

Hey, Squidward, say "kid" backward. Also, suck my dick!

I was bullying a little kid for having a purple eye and said, "Where'd you get that? Your mom? Your dad?"

After that, everyone in my group was laughing at the kid. The next day I never saw him again.

I asked this kid for a high five, but he could not reach my hand.

The police: Pull over!

The kid: Do you know who my dad is?

The police: What, your mom did not tell you?

Am I the only one here?

The image shows two panels. In the top panel, a character from an object show is shown with a sad face, representing the feeling of being the only one who knows about the shows. The text reads: 'When I'm the only kid in the school that knows object shows (Like bfdi or Inanimate Insanity).' The bottom panel shows the same character looking surprised and happy, with the text 'But when I'm walking down the hallway and then I see a kid I don't know wearing a Battle For Dream Island shirt.'

I saw some kids bullying a kid in a wheelchair. I grabbed the kid, pushed him down the stairs, and said, "GTA physics."

Teacher: Anyone missing?

Orphan: My parents.

Teacher: Something that is real, kid.

Orphan: My family.

Teacher: OMG, out of my classroom, kid!

A kid calls out for his mom one day while he is in the tub and says, "Mom come quick! I'm walking on water!"

And the mom runs in and says, "I knew evon whatent yo daddy! I ain't never slept with him a day my life!"

Cousin: Hahaha, I am their biological parent.

Kid: So what? At least they love me more.

A friend of mine told me something that I cannot forget, and I am now traumatized to hell. The next day a kid was set for an amber alert that looked exactly like my DEAR friend! :)

Emo kids are so good at kicking football. I hear they have good hang time.

What do you call a horde of Autistic kids?

A zombie Apocalypse!

Uuuuuuhhhhhhhhh🧟

I was playing Fortnite with a kid, then I heard their emo sister in the background, and it sounded like they were playing Fortnite, too, with the pistol shot and all.

What do you call a kid with cancer? Limited.

I pushed a disabled kid over, and he came crawling back to me.

I told a disabled kid to get in my van. Well, it’s been two years, and he still hasn’t gotten into the van.

What's your fav color?

"Emo kid hanging."

I got sent to the principal's office for giving an orphan kid a family-size pack.

There was a kid in my class who said my face looked like a physical reaction (we were learning about that stuff at the time), so I said I made a chemical reaction with his mom last night.