Kid jokes
Cousin: Hahaha, I am their biological parent.
Kid: So what? At least they love me more.
Hey, Squidward, say "kid" backward. Also, suck my dick!
I was bullying a little kid for having a purple eye and said, "Where'd you get that? Your mom? Your dad?"
After that, everyone in my group was laughing at the kid. The next day I never saw him again.
I asked this kid for a high five, but he could not reach my hand.
The police: Pull over!
The kid: Do you know who my dad is?
The police: What, your mom did not tell you?
Memes
Bob, why are you kicking the kids?
What, it's not like they have a home to go to.
Jack and his kids went to the lake, and his mother wants him to go swimming. You know what he says? "Back where you came from!"
Man: Could you hold this for me?
Kid: Ok mister! I love playing with a pew pew! Pow! Pew! Pew! Bang! *GUNSHOT*
Man: Dammit, now who am I gonna put in the van?!
How many fat people are in my house?
20, counting the kids in the basement.
Dad: My kid just said "butch," but since he is a kid, he said a bad word on accident.
*The next day*
Uncle: F*CK!
Hey kids, guess who started a micronation?
It’s Barney and Trump. They don’t let gays in, but they kill them.
I got sent to the principal's office for giving an orphan kid a family-size pack.
What do you call a kid with cancer? Limited.
There was a kid in my class who said my face looked like a physical reaction (we were learning about that stuff at the time), so I said I made a chemical reaction with his mom last night.
I told a disabled kid to get in my van. Well, it’s been two years, and he still hasn’t gotten into the van.
I was playing Fortnite with a kid, then I heard their emo sister in the background, and it sounded like they were playing Fortnite, too, with the pistol shot and all.
I pushed a disabled kid over, and he came crawling back to me.
Friends = your power level.
Emo kid = power level: 0000.
What do you call a horde of Autistic kids?
A zombie Apocalypse!
Uuuuuuhhhhhhhhh🧟
What's your fav color?
"Emo kid hanging."