INS jokes
Why did Stephen Hawking die?
Because he forgot to plug in the charger.
Your teeth are so spread out my mom can drive her car through the gap in your teeth.
My mom told me to get a job, so I did.
One day my mom saw me, I had money. My mom asked me where did you get that money? My mom asked me where did you get that money. I said I got a job in the neighborhood. My mom asked me what do you do, so I said when you take showers I secretly open the door, and I let the guys come and see you one by one, and I get paid for it.
My mom said you're growing up so fast, & I said back to my mom that is what the guys say when they see you in the shower.
If 7 8 9 why was ten scared?
It was right in the middle of 9/11.
Why is there A/C in hospitals?
So the vegetables stay nice and fresh.
To anyone who wants to be my friend:
Hello.
Does anyone wanna be my friend? Please if ya' do reply to my: "Hello." In the chat. Tysm. Have a greaat day!
Alex <3
What’s 9 inches long and makes my girlfriend scream?
One inch and put it in her. Her miscarriage.
Bigfoot is just a normal person who covered himself in Pritt Stick and went down on Susan Boyle.
Me: Spell "I cup."
My Friend: I see you pee.
Me: BOII YOU BETTER GIVE MEH SOME PRIVACY IN MY BATH ROOM!!!!
My Friend: Oh hehe O-O
My name must taste good because it’s always in your mouth.
I have a dead fish in my lunchbox.
100% of blind people in Africa can't see. Together, we can stop this.
Q: What’s the difference between a priest and McDonald’s?
A: Nothing! They both stick their meat in 10 year old buns.
I got my son a trampoline for his birthday. The ungrateful cunt sat in his wheelchair all day.
My phone is just like the Twin Towers; they got put in airplane mode.
The toothbrush says, "I have the worst job in the whole world."
The toilet paper behind him says, "Yeah, right."
There's no "I" in team, but there is a "U" in cunt.
My mom told me it's not healthy to stay in my room all day... but the only places I'm allowed to go to are my room and downstairs.
A guy stole my car last night. Before dialing 911 I thought, "Fuck it. Let him explain the dead bodies in the trunk."
Hardest part about being a paedophile?
Fitting in.