INS jokes
I was at a concert in the front row, and I shouted something to the band's guitarist. He took it the wrong way and responded: "I'm going to go down there and hit you with my guitar!"
And I replied: "Is that a death fret?"
Why was 10 afraid?
He was in the middle of 9/11.
Hi guys, I'm back! So I have a question for you. What is red and smells like blue paint? Type in comments what you came up with.
Night chat! Starts in 4 hours! Love Kenya! 😘
What do you do when you finish a magazine in school?
Answer: You shoot it!
I got banned from the library because I put the woman's rights book in the fiction section.
Your mamma is so fat that she saved me a lot of money by sitting in my car when I wanted to buy a low rider.
What are you willing to write in your notebook? These nuts.
Why is the letter "B" very cool? Because it's sitting in the AC.
What does a kite and a criminal have in common?
They both get high.
What do you call an orphan in Alabama?
A virgin.
Jack and Rose went on a cruise to do it in the water.
Jack seldom wore a condom, and now they have a daughter.
What's the difference between crazy people and regular people?
We don't live in their heads.
1, 2, 3, 4, 5. I'm old enough to drive, for now I'm still alive, till I crash in that beehive!
You know how to draw a horse? If not, look in a mirror and draw what you see.
What fruit is square and green? A lemon in disguise.
My friend nearly drowned in her bowl of muesli the other day. She was pulled in by a strong "currant."
What’s a foot on one end, a foot on the other end, and a foot in the middle?
A meter stick.
What’s the difference between 69 and a family reunion?
You only see one asshole in 69.
Who are the fastest readers in the world? New Yorkers. They went through 110 stories in under 10 seconds.