INS jokes
Who are the fastest readers in the world?
Answer: 9/11 victims. They went through 80 stories in 5 seconds.
My father died in 9/11. It's such a shame. He was a great pilot. 😔
What do you call a virgin kid locked in a room with a pedophile? Past tense.
An 80-year-old blind man asks his grandson, "Can you grab my glasses?"
Then the grandson says, "Did you get in the flour again?"
Grandpa said, "No, it was the weed."
I threw my boomerang and now I live in constant fear.
Hi i thought this was funny i guess haha 💔⛓️
A blind man was walking into a fish market. He took a deep breath and said, “Good morning, ladies!”
A teacher asks her class, “What do you want to be when you grow up?” Little Johnny says “I wanna be a billionaire, going to the most expensive clubs, take the best b*tch with me, give her a Ferrari worth over a million bucks, an apartment in Hawaii, a mansion in Paris, a jet to travel through Europe, an Infinite Visa Card and to make love to her three times a day.”
The teacher, shocked, and not knowing what to do with the bad behavior of the child, decides not to give importance to what he said and then continues the lesson. “And you, Susie?” the teacher asks. Susie says “I wanna be Johnny’s b*tch.”
What do a Make-A-Wish kid and mosquitoes have in common?
They both got a 10% survival rate...
When your mom comes in at night then sees your... sleeping, but sees something moving, so she gets a chair and whacks it, then she says, "I thought it was a mouse."
A lady asked if I heard about the mass shooting in Ohio. I said yes, my friend died there. She said I’m so sorry. I said yeah, I tried telling him the police had good aim. Worse than that, he just found out his sister was cheating on him.
What does a Catholic Priest and a commercial from the 80s have in common? They both ask people, "Where's the meat?"
Why was Josef Vasicek a Stanley Cup champion in 2006?
Because you know who was jealous and he went down in 2020.
I'm doing a new thing where you say an object in the comments, and I will try to make a joke based off the object.
If you are interested, you can submit an object in the comments.
I will give the person credit each joke I do.
God promised John that if he came in 1st, he would get an eternal life, but instead he came in 5th and got a kettle!
What do you call a kid in a wheelchair on fire?
Hot wheels.
Why is arson so fun?
IT'S A FIRE ACTIVITY!
HAHAHAHAHAHAPAHAAHAHIIRTAASIISISISHRNHHTHTHTHHNHSHSNIHTAHE
Day 83 of being trapped in þis room. I made a language. I call it hertof. I speak wiþ þe walls now.
There was this boy. He had diarrhea, and he kept asking to go to the bathroom, but the teacher said no. Next thing you know, he pooped himself in front of the class.
What do you do if your dishwasher stops working?
Punch her in the face and remind her of her duties.
A man went to the doctor, and the doctor said, "What happened to you?"
The man replied and said, "I broke my arm in two places!"
Then the doctor replied with, "DON’T GO BACK TO THOSE TWO PLACES!!"
"Why do cemeteries have fences around them? Because everyone's dying to get in!"