Humor

Today is the day of 9/11, and we were in class making jokes, and somebody said, "That's sad." I was like, "Why?" And they said, "Today is the day the towers went down." I said, "Just like I did on your mum last night."

I would tell you a milk joke, but it's whey too cheesy!

9 out of 10 people enjoy gang rape.

If you get pinched by a man in a wheelchair, can you call it a "hit and can't run?"

To the man in the wheelchair who stole my camouflage jacket, "You can hide but you can't run."

What do a coin and an Irish man have in common?

They're both fun to flip off.

How do you stay warm in a cold room?

You go to the corners. It's always 90 degrees.

Men wake up with a boner.

Women wake up yawning.

Coincidence?

What goes 100mph and bounces up and down? A baby tied to the back of a truck.

What is a lesbian's favorite potato chip flavor? Porn Cocktail.

Question: Why can't you trust a tree?

Answer: 'Cause they are always shady.

I am still trying to figure out why paying the COVID doctors a compliment is so offensive. They even kicked me out, and all I said was to stay positive...

if an emo doesn't get better by Christmas Santas reindeer won't be the only thing jumping off roofs this year

A Down syndrome kid asks for an ice cream. The man asks, "Do you want sauce on it?"

The kid says, "It doesn’t matter, I’m going to drop it anyway!" 😂😂😂

Want my opinion on Mongolia? It has its pros and Khans.

I would roast you, but you don't have any meat!

Stephen was a great person, and he will be greatly missed, but I enjoy these jokes too much to not stop.

Me: I kiss my mom on the lips.

Friend: Uh, I guess that's somewhat nor-

Me: Lower lips.

Friend: I gotta go.

A blind man had an argument with a man in a wheelchair. The man in a wheelchair made fun of him saying, "look, there's a spider." The blind man simply said, "Step on it."

What does a cannibal call people in water?

Sea food.