Humor
What do you call a Muslim in a swimming pool? A bath bomb.
What's the difference between a cop car and a hedgehog?
With a cop car, all the pricks are on the inside.
They asked me to speak at this funeral, and I said, "Of corpse!"
What are intelligent people in the US called?
"Tourist."
Me: I just came home from Africa, and guess what I saw.
Friend: I don't know.
Me: A black market.
I’d tell you a Chinese joke, but it’s wong.
Bro, I love hanging out with white people, it's either we play Yahtzee, or we playin' Nazi.
What does an Asian doorbell sound like?
"Wing wong wung wang, wong wang wing wong!"
What’s the difference between an emo kid and a dead pig?
Suicide squad.
What do you call having a 69 with a guy in a wheelchair?
MEALS ON WHEELS :-)
What is a Russian joke?
Something that will be funny for Russian people.
We should not stop orphan jokes. They're funny as fuck.
What's the motto for a pizza place that's also an abortion clinic: Your loss is our sauce.
Welcome to Jimmy's orphanage and pizza shop, where today's loss is a sauce. How may I help you?
Who is Joe?
You reply back: Who is Candice?
They reply back: Who is Candice?
You say: "Candice nuts fit into Joe Mama's mouth."
What does the depressed person say to the happy person?
"Damn, I wish I was on the stuff you're on, lol."
What’s a Muslim’s favorite car?
A Citroën C4.
Yo mama so fat, NASA has a satellite orbiting around her.
An unfortunate accident happened at the Nestlè factory. A man named Joe was seriously injured because a box of chocolates fell on him. Every time he said, "The chocolates are on me!" everyone cheered.
Two pedos are on the beach.
One pedo said, "Hey, get out of my son!"