Humor
What's the difference between your mom in bed and Biden in the presidential race?
Your mom finishes.
What's the difference between a cop car and a hedgehog?
With a cop car, all the pricks are on the inside.
What do you call a Muslim in a swimming pool? A bath bomb.
Why is Sunday better than Monday?
Because Monday is a weak day.
Why does the large dildo not have any friends?
He's a pain in the ass.
Memes
Me after Monday
How do you know if you have a high sperm count?
She chews before she swallows.
What knight is never wrong?
Sir Tain.
What do you get when you cross a stick and a dog? A run away joke...
Me: I just came home from Africa, and guess what I saw.
Friend: I don't know.
Me: A black market.
What does an Asian doorbell sound like?
"Wing wong wung wang, wong wang wing wong!"
What’s the difference between an emo kid and a dead pig?
Suicide squad.
Bro, I love hanging out with white people, it's either we play Yahtzee, or we playin' Nazi.
We should not stop orphan jokes. They're funny as fuck.
What do you call having a 69 with a guy in a wheelchair?
MEALS ON WHEELS :-)
What's the motto for a pizza place that's also an abortion clinic: Your loss is our sauce.
Who is Joe?
You reply back: Who is Candice?
They reply back: Who is Candice?
You say: "Candice nuts fit into Joe Mama's mouth."
Welcome to Jimmy's orphanage and pizza shop, where today's loss is a sauce. How may I help you?
What is a Russian joke?
Something that will be funny for Russian people.
What do skeletons say before they eat?
Bone appétit. ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
What do you call Helen Keller in a pitch black, sound proof room?
Redundant.