If you were a food what would you be?
Friend 1-Pizza cause I’m so cheesy
Friend 2-Chocolate chip cookie cause I have lots of friends
Me-donut cause I’m so empty inside
Chocolate Jokes
Life is like a box of chocolates, mostly dissapointing
I heard a joke about chocolate bars and it wasn’t that funny. So I just snickered…
What do you call a sheep covered in chocolate? – A candy baa.
Three kids one day found a magical slide. There was a sign next to it saying, “what ever you wish for comes true once you slide down”. One kid stepped up and slid down, he wished for a river of chocolate, thus he swam in a chocolate river. The second kid slid down and wished for a mountain of money, he then landed in a pile of money. The third kid went down and said, “Weeeeeeee”!
Why is a gun like a box of chocolates? If you pull one out in class, everyone wants to be your friend.
What is the suns favorite chocolate bar? A Milky Way 😱
Life is like a box of chocolates. It doesn’t last as long for fat people.
What is an alien’s favourite chocolate? A mars bar
Did you hear about the magician who did magic with chocolate? I heard he had loads of Twix up his sleeve.
Little Johnny walks out to the garage, and sees Dad smoking a cigarette… He asks, “Hey Dad, can I have a puff of that cigarette??” Dad asks, “Well Johnny, can your dick reach your ass??” Little Johnny scratches his head and thinks about it for a moment… He then replies, “Well, No Dad, my dick can’t reach my ass”… His Dad says, “There’s your answer, Johnny…” Little Johnny goes back in the house…
About an hour later Little Johnny comes back out to the garage, and sees his Dad drinking a beer… He asks, “Hey Dad, can I have some of that beer??” Dad asks, “Well Johnny, can your dick reach your ass??” Little Johnny scratches his head and thinks about it for a moment… He then replies, “Well, No Dad, my dick can’t reach my ass”… His Dad says, “There’s your answer, Johnny…” Little Johnny goes back in the house…
About an hour later Little Johnny comes back out to the garage with a BIG plate of Tollhouse Chocolate Chip cookies, fresh from the oven… His Dad says, “WOW Johnny, those sure look like some good cookies… You think I can have some??” Little Johnny asks his Dad, “Well Dad, can your dick reach your ass??” His Dad scratches his head and thinks about it for a moment… He then replies, “Well, Yes Johnny, I do believe my dick can reach my ass”… Little Johnny says, “Well Dad, you can go FUKC yourself, cuz Mom made these cookies for me!!!”…
What’s the difference between people and chocolate? I can still buy dark chocolate
Life is like a box of chocolate, it doesn’t last long if you’re fat
What are chocolates preferred gender pronouns? Her-She
If Bruno Mars was to run a pub and sell chocolate bars other than alcoholic drinks then he’ll have to call his pub a Mars Bar
Yo momma so stupid she eats cardboard boxes thinking it’s chocolate bars.
My “choco” is too “late” for lunch.
What do you get when a dog that is actually a Weeto is caught in an earthquake?
Just like a chocolate milkshake, only crunchy!
The Mother and her Daughter went to the store. After they arrived, the Daughter looked around and ran off somewhere. The Mother realized this and took off looking for her, after awhile, she found her tugging on a black man, the Mother asked “What are you doing” and the Daughter replied “I wan’t the chocolate”