Humor
The man was dangling by a string!
I was jealous the day he died.
Teacher: Why did you throw paper airplanes at the twin sisters?
Me: You wouldn't get it.
Boobs are like friends: you have big ones, small ones, real ones, fake ones, but they all get taken out by cancer.
What do you call an alligator that reads maps? Navigator.
What is the difference between a gay person and a refrigerator?
The refrigerator doesn’t start moaning and groaning when you try to put the meat in.
Memes
ben woof
Why did the boy put a chicken 🐔 in his garden?
He wanted to grow an eggplant. 😂
What is a monkey’s 🐒 favorite dance move?
The banana 🍌 split.
Why was the giraffe late to work?
Because it got caught in a giraffic jam.
What did the sweet potato say to the potato when he was told to hurry?
I yam.
What do you call an orphan fish?
Self-ish.
Have you heard the latest pun about pizza?
Never mind. It’s too cheesy!
What hangs low?
Balls.
My friend looks like a homeless, thanks for the jokes.
So I thought about trying to eat a clock one day.
After about 13 tries, I realized this was very time consuming.
My aunt's star sign was Cancer, so it's pretty ironic how she died...
She was eaten by a giant crab.
Person 1: Why did you put the baby feet first into the blender?
Person 2: To see his facial expression. Why else?
Did you hear about the guy who invented the first knock knock joke?
He won the No Bell Prize!
Why didn’t the girl like stairs?
They were always up to something.
What is a tree's favorite thing to drink?
Root beer.
How did Stephen Hawking die? Because he didn't charge his batteries.