Humor
I’ve got a joke about Alzheimers.
Um.
Oh no. I can’t actually remember it.
What do kids with cancer and cancer jokes have in common?
They never get old.
What do you call six gay men at war? Rainbow Six Siege.
My friend told me an emo joke once, and I said, "Emo jokes aren't funny, cut it out!"
What's the difference between roast beef and pea soup?
It's easy to roast beef.
If you shit in a church, is it a holy shit?
Me.
The joke is me.
There are 5 cats on a boat, and 1 jumps off. How many are left?
Zero, they were copycats.
Why do women always have sex with the lights off?
Because they never like to see a man having a good time.
Boobs are like friends: you have big ones, small ones, real ones, fake ones, but they all get taken out by cancer.
I put the fun in dysfunctional.
What do you call an alligator that reads maps? Navigator.
Roses are red. Violets are blue. Sugar is sweet. And your mom is, too.
There are two muffins baking in an oven. One muffin says to the other, "Phew, is it getting hot in here or is it just me?"
The other muffin says, "AAAAHHH!! A TALKING MUFFIN!"
My grandma unplugged the internet cable, so I unplugged her life support.
The man was dangling by a string!
I was jealous the day he died.
I don't know what to write here, just like...
Two Asian people have a black baby.
Something wrong.
So I’m riding in the car with my dad and all of a sudden I smell something rank without warning.
My dad starts laughing at me.
Dad: “Son! That must have been an orphan fart! You know why?”
Me: “Why dad?”
Dad: “Because it ain’t got no pop!”
Why did the stoner cross the road?
He got so wasted, he thought he was a chicken.