Image Jokes

How do computers get drunk?

They take a screenshot.

Once I saw a mirror... and that was when I got the ability to become a ghost.

My wife is like a mirror.

I can never look at it.

Oh, my fat joke offended you? Which one of your chins did I hurt?

What kind of family pictures do orphans take?

Selfies!!

The image is a four-panel grid. The top left panel shows a single cup of tea with the word "Tea" above it. The top right panel shows three smaller cups of tea with the text "Some tea" above it. The middle left panel shows a single cup of coffee with the word "Coffee" above it. The middle right panel shows four small cups of coffee with the words "Some coffee" above it. The bottom left panel shows a drawing of a body with the word "Body" above it. The bottom right panel shows a scene from the movie "Shrek", with Shrek standing in front of his house with the text "Some body".

Hey girl, are your pants a mirror? 'Cause I can see myself in them.

You're so cool that celebrities take pictures of you.

Best not leave hungry kids unattended!

I have a short TRUE story of how I found out my brother was gay and did "it" with his best friend.

When my brother was 12-13 years old, he fucked his best friend and I saw it. I was like 4-5 years old, UNDERSTANDING what "it" stood for at the time. All I heard was "ahh" and "mmm". The only thing that traumatized me the most was when my brother moaned "daddy". I was so traumatized that I told my mother about it, she rolled her eyes and said, "He's probably playing a game with Evan". BULLSHIT... NO YOU DUMBASS. He was playing the game "SEX", more like "GAY SEX".

I even told my father and he said, "I don't understand what you're trying to say". I told him DIRECTLY that I heard my brother say "daddy" to his damn best friend!

I actually got so curious, I opened the door and saw them doing "69". I was blank white after I saw it. I will NEVER forget that he did "it" with his own best friend.. NEVER forget about it.

(just a btw, I still have the image stuck in my head and never forget how YOUNG he was..)

(He ain't no virgin anymore I guess lmfao.)

(MORE STORIES COMING SOON =D)