Image jokes
How do computers get drunk?
They take a screenshot.
Once I saw a mirror... and that was when I got the ability to become a ghost.
My wife is like a mirror.
I can never look at it.
Oh, my fat joke offended you? Which one of your chins did I hurt?
Hey girl, are your pants a mirror? 'Cause I can see myself in them.
Memes
What kind of family pictures do orphans take?
Selfies!!
You're so cool that celebrities take pictures of you.
Best not leave hungry kids unattended!
What do you call a black person swimming?
Cursed Minecraft image.
What do you call a flat-chested emo?
A cutting board.
I have a short TRUE story of how I found out my brother was gay and did "it" with his best friend.
When my brother was 12-13 years old, he fucked his best friend and I saw it. I was like 4-5 years old, UNDERSTANDING what "it" stood for at the time. All I heard was "ahh" and "mmm". The only thing that traumatized me the most was when my brother moaned "daddy". I was so traumatized that I told my mother about it, she rolled her eyes and said, "He's probably playing a game with Evan". BULLSHIT... NO YOU DUMBASS. He was playing the game "SEX", more like "GAY SEX".
I even told my father and he said, "I don't understand what you're trying to say". I told him DIRECTLY that I heard my brother say "daddy" to his damn best friend!
I actually got so curious, I opened the door and saw them doing "69". I was blank white after I saw it. I will NEVER forget that he did "it" with his own best friend.. NEVER forget about it.
(just a btw, I still have the image stuck in my head and never forget how YOUNG he was..)
(He ain't no virgin anymore I guess lmfao.)
(MORE STORIES COMING SOON =D)
What do you call an orphan taking a family photo?
A selfie.
I took a plane to go see my hairline.
What do you call an orphanβs picture?
A family photo.
Yo mama is so fat that when she was at school, they needed a satellite to take her school photo.
Biggest joke?
[Image of Zac Efron]
My brother when he sees a girl.
Are you a mirror, because I see myself in you?
Don't listen to people when they say you have a dad bod. You don't.
You have a father figure.
You're so fat that when they tried to print a picture of you through the computer, they couldn't fit you in the whole picture because you were so big!