Humor
*insert pun here*
What do you call a man off the ground?
Hanged.
What is a chicken's favorite day of the week? Fri-day.
The real reason Stephen Hawking died is because he tried to overclock his wheelchair.
What separates snowmen from snow-women?
Snow balls.
When her head game is so strong, she sucks the chromosome right out of you.
Tell me a joke.
OK, your face.
Have you heard about my new can crushing job?
It's soda-pressing.
What was Stephen Hawking's mother's name?
Ilean.
How much work does a skeleton get done?
A SKELE-TON!
Joe Mama!
I would tell you the pun about the broken pencil, but it has no point to it.
Jack and Jill went up a hill so Jack could eat her candy. But Jack got a shock and a mouth full of c*** because Jill's real name is Randy.
Jack and Jill went up a hill to smoke some marijuana. Jack got high, pulled down his fly, and said, "Jill do you wanna?" Jill said yes, pulled up her dress, and then they had some fun. But stupid Jill forgot the pill so now they have a son.
Why didn't the skeleton go to prom?
He was dead. You fool. You fell for my trick. I'm very heartless.
Oh wait.
You fool!
I say hi to Sans. Sans shows his hand and says, "It's hand to meet you," and we both laugh.
These jokes make me want to die.
What's yellow and can't swim?
A school bus full of kids drowning.
Show me a piano falling down a mineshaft, and I’ll show you A-flat minor.
Why is an iPhone X perfect for an orphan? Because it doesn't have a home button.