Humor
1. What's the difference between Dark humor and Morbid humor? Dark humor is 10 babies in 1 trash can and Morbid humor is 1 baby in 10 trash cans.
2. What's the difference between a pizza and a baby? A pizza doesn't scream in the oven.
What goes black, white, black, white, down a hill?
A fat nun.
Toothbrush says, "I have the worst job ever."
Toilet paper says, "You think your job is shitty."
What is the difference between a priest and a doctor?
The doctor doesn't like to give physicals.
Yo mama is so ugly, she is the reason Slenderman has no eyes.
When it's April Fool's Day, go to an orphan and say, "Their parents should come back!"
What do depressed people and Apple's have in common?
They both hang from trees.
I am trying to re-comment something that used to be on here, but is no longer on here.
Here are some rules to make a good joke:
1: Don't say “my life.”
2: Proofread your joke and make sure people can read it/have good grammar in it.
3: And don’t repost things (although this last one is hypocritical because this was me trying to repost something, but it is still a good rule to go by).
How can toilet paper decorate your house?
Shit sticks everywhere.
What’s Stephan Hawking's favorite dance move?
The robot.
What do you call a dog that tells time?
A watchdog.
What do you call a cow 🐮 in an earthquake?
A milkshake.
What do you say when you wake up to the police trying to arrest you?
“C'mon, did ya really think I’d resist arrest?”
Why did Helen Keller’s boyfriend have wax on his finger? Because he was whispering sweet nothings into her ear!
I weeee is?
I got in touch with my inner self today, it's the last time I use 1-ply toilet roll.
I was going to tell a joke about babies, but I decided to abort.
Why did Stephen Hawking die?
Because his wife changed the WiFi password.
What YouTube channel did Mt. Fuji subscribe to? Chrissy Man.
What is stuck between a doorway?
Rebel Wilson.