Hit

Hit jokes

Mother

  • A baby skunk's mother gets hit by a car, so the baby skunk doesn't know what he is.

    So the baby skunk walks up to a baby bunny and asks, "What are you?" The baby bunny replies, "Well, I'm a baby bunny. What are you?" The baby skunk says, "Well, I don't know, am I a baby bunny too?"

    The baby bunny says, "No, you're not a baby bunny." So the baby skunk asks, "Well, what am I then?"

    The baby bunny replies, "Well, you're not exactly blank and you're not exactly white, so you must be Mexican."

  • 4
  • Hail

  • A German soldier is walking down the street during a hail storm when a lady suddenly falls over after being hit. He, along with a few others, walk over to her. One man asks, "What happened?" and the soldier replies, "Hail hit her."

  • 5
  • Emo kid

  • An apple and an emo kid fall off a tree at the same time. Who hits the ground first?

    The apple, because the emo kid got caught by the rope.

  • 5
  • Hot Dog

  • Two homeless alcoholics want to get drunk but don't have enough money for even the cheapest drinks in any bar. So one of them devises a clever plan: he tells his friend, "We should buy a hot-dog sausage with the last of our money and stick it down my pants, then drink a load of drinks. But then when the bill comes, you get down and suck on the hot-dog, and it'll look like you're sucking on my dick. So then we'll get thrown out without paying, and we can just go to another bar and do the same thing again."

    His friend agrees, so they buy the hot-dog, stick it down the first dude's pants, go to the bar, and then the second dude begins to suck on the hot-dog as agreed. They are thrown out and hit another four bars this way. In the end, as they lie drunk on the floor in some alleyway, the second guy says, "Well, what a great night. Free beers in five different bars!" The first guy says, "Yeah! Especially since the hot-dog fell out before we even reached the first bar!"

  • 11
  • Community talk

  • my mom kicked me out bc i said "im sorry i wasnt the perfect daughter" she hit me and tmw im going to the councilers office, i dont have a fucking bookbag, not a phone either, andjst my school laptop. im going to my grandmas house, ily all sm

  • Almost just got hit by a fucking car while riding my bike home fucking drunkass college idiots believing theire invincible while having taking 50 shots in the past hour