Hit jokes
What do women and appliances have in common?
If they don't work, hit them until they work.
A small, nervous woman steps into a hotel elevator in Las Vegas.
At the next floor, three large, burly men step in. The woman is immediately intimidated and clutches her purse tightly.
Suddenly, one of the men says in a deep voice: "Hit the floor!"
Terrified that she is about to be robbed, the woman drops her bags and collapses face down onto the floor of the elevator, cowering in fear.
The men burst out laughing and help the bewildered woman up. The speaker apologizes profusely and says: "No, ma'am, I meant hit the button for our floor!"
The next morning, the woman receives a massive bouquet of roses and has her entire hotel bill paid for. Attached is a note that says: "Thanks for the best laugh I've had in years."
Jack and Jill went up my ass to eat a big dildo, but Jack died cause he got hit by a brown thing.
I met this kid and he was being bullied by 9 people. I Asked 1 whats going on. They all said another one to bully they all tried hitting me and then my mates which was like 15 of them came in and it was like war all over again.
What did Pavol Demitra think before the Yaroslavl plane hit the ground?
"Oh shit, did I leave the stove on at home?"
Why can't Juice WRLD hit rock bottom?
Because he's too high.
Q: What did the Iceberg say to the Titanic?
A: I'd hit that.
Why don't Indians play baseball?
Every time they reach a corner, they make a shop.
I ran into a fat woman today. She said next time, don't hit me. I said I don't think I have enough gas to go around.
Then the ground started to rumble with every step she took.
Why is it okay to hit an orphan?
It’s not like they can tell their parents.
How ironic is this?! I was playing Jenga before the first plane hit the Twin Towers.
Why did Sally fall off the swing?
Because she was hit by a bus.
The pilot that hit the Pentagon must suck at sex because he missed the hole.
Is it bad to hit an orphan?
What are they gonna do, tell their parents?
Well... I mean, they could go to church and try to gather that someone hit them.
Why did Gemma fall off her bike?
She got hit by a fridge.
Why do orphans not tell when they get hit?
Because who are they gonna tell, their mom?
Why can’t orphans have an iPhone?
Because they can’t hit the home button.
What nails do carpenters hate to hit?
Thumb nails.
Tell a dark joke to an orphan, then hit them. They'll get the punchline right away.
John Kreese's forehead broke when silver hit 'em in the forehead.