Hit jokes
When I hit a home run, I finally felt what it was like to have a home.
Why is it okay to hit an orphan?
It’s not like they can tell their parents.
Today was a really bad day. My mother-in-law was hit by a cab AND I lost my job as a cab driver!
Why did the kid drop his ice cream cone? Because he got hit by a bus!
Why don't bulls play archery? They might hit a bulls-eye.
If you ever get bored, just hit an orphan. What are they gonna do? Tell their parents?
A teacher asked her young students to get their parents to tell them a story with a moral at the end of it. The next day, the kids came back and one by one began to tell their stories. There were all the regular type of stuff.
But then the teacher realized that only Janie was left. "Janie, do you have a story to share?" "Yes madam... My daddy told me a story about my Mom." "OK, let's hear" said the teacher.
"My Mom was a Marine pilot in Operation Desert Storm in Iraq and her plane got hit." "She had to bail out over enemy territory and all she had was a flask of whiskey, a pistol, and a survival knife." "She drank the whiskey on the way down so the bottle wouldn't break and then her parachute landed her right in the middle of 20 Iraqi troops." "She shot 15 of them with the pistol, until she ran out of bullets, killed four more with the knife, till the blade broke and then she killed the last Iraqi with her bare hands."
Pin drop silence in the class!
"Good Heavens" said the horrified teacher "What did your Daddy tell you was the moral to this horrible story?"
"Stay away from Mummy when she's drunk...!!!!"
When fat people smash, it must feel like a huge submarine hitting you.
You're walking into a bar and you see 2 younger kids around 18. You call the manager to have them removed, but no one came down.
Later that night, you see the 2 18-year-olds, 1 was a girl and the other was a boy, so you call the manager down. No one came again. You confront them and tell them to leave, but one turns around and hits you. You are knocked out on the floor. When you wake up, there is a hard feeling in your a**. You turn your head around and there is an autistic girl with a strap-on in your a** going full on hard.
Why did Hitler's girlfriend break up with him? He Hit-ler.
When Kobe's pilot hit the mountain, he said, "Kobe."
What did the Ford Mustang say to the crowd of innocent people?
I'D HIT THAT!
I don’t know why I’m in jail. So, basically, I was at a gun range, and we were supposed to hit the targets, even though I hit it.
The parents used to hit him.
His parents got into a car crash and died.
He became an orphan in an orphanage. The people there hit him. He looked up and said "Parents?"
I don't really understand 9/11 jokes, but they eventually hit me like a plane.
What's the difference between Wacko Jacko and Elvis Presley?
14 number 1 hits.
I hit on the Twin Towers. They were hot.
Like this if you laughed.
These orphan jokes would leave them crying to their mommies if they had any.
I made a website for orphans. Unfortunately, it doesn’t have a home page.
Why is it ok to hit an orphan? It’s not like they can tell their parents.
Why did the orphan go to church? So he had someone to call Father.
Why do orphans love boomerangs? Because they come back. (Clearly someone didn't come back with the milk)
Why was the orphan so successful? When they told him go big or go home, he only had one option.
What’s the only advantage of being an orphan? Nobody makes jokes about yo mamma.
Hope you had fun reading this! My friend and I laughed reading all of em!
"What did we hit?"
"I don't know, a rock."
My name is Justin. I like boys. Hit me up?