History jokes
Jim: My grandpa fought in the army during World War Two. He was an officer.
Me: Cool, what rank of officer?
Jim: SS.
Me:...
Why did Muhammad Ali go down? Because he couldn't stand the cancer.
Why are Americans bad chess players?
Because they lost two towers.
Why is a brick always hard? Because the Indians played with it enough.
Why were the Twin Towers angry?
They ordered pepperoni, but they only got plane.
Is it a bird, is it a plane?
No, it’s a 9/11 victim.
My dad said people shouldn’t get ribbons just for participating because it rewards them for losing.
So I took down his confederate flag.
How are the Twin Towers and genders similar? There used to be two, but now it's a sensitive subject.
Why did the T-Rex cross the road?
The chicken wasn’t invented then.
I'll rate this a 9/11.
My grandfather lost his tongue during WW2.
He never talks about it.
What was Hitler's favorite thing to do to pass the time?
Smoking.
Q: Why was 10 afraid?
A: Because he was always between 9/11.
Hey, 2nd Amendmenters! Wanna know what gun Jesus used during his time?
What?
A nail gun!
Who's better, Hitler or Jesus?
Hitler: Jesus made bread for 1000 whereas Hitler made meat for 10,000. 😅😅😅😅 (no offense)
(To circumcised people)
When the North Tower saw the South Tower collapse, he would say, "I'm still standing."
Why do orphans get confused about ancient Egypt? Because they wouldn’t know what a mummy is.
As I am from South Carolina, I just thought about something Jefferson Davis would have thought about:
"Them slaves taking credit for everything."
What's the square root of 2001?
9/11
What's the difference between Harry Potter and a Holocaust victim?
Harry made it out of the chamber.