Health jokes
Cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer.
When did I realize COVID was serious?
When I saw your teeth social distancing.
My doctor called me fat. I told him I wanted a second opinion and he said, "OK, you're ugly too."
A 90 year old man takes a Viagra.
Strips off naked, lies down in an alley way. Three chicks walk on by: a blond, a brunette, and a red head.
The red head said, "I'm not letting that go to waste," so she strips off and rides him. When she's finished,
The brunette then strips off naked and rides him. The blond's now worried because she just got her period. The red head sez, "He's dead. Don't let it go to waste," so she strips off naked and rides him. Then he wakes up. He then says, "Wow, two jump starts and a blood transfusion. I'm good to go!"
What did the doctor say to the Chinese patient? "Sum ting wong."
Jack and Jill went up the hill 'cause Jack took a Viagra.
Jill was drunk, fell to her knee, Jack had his chance, did Jill till 3.
Why are retards good at basketball?
'Cause they dribble all the time!
Have you heard about the movie "Constipation"?
No, because it never came out...
What's a person with Down syndrome's favorite detergent?
Downy.
Don't let an extra chromosome get you down.
I told a diabetic boy to have sweet dreams, and he died the next morning.
Why did the lil kid cut himself?
Answer: Because he was emo, HAHHHAHAHAHAAHHA!
Roses are blue, violets are blue.
What? Ohh, shit!!!!!! I hate having dyslexia!
What's the difference between a baby and an onion?
One cries when you peel its skin off, the other makes you cry when you peel its skin off.
What did the left butt cheek say to the right butt cheek? "Together we can stop this shit!"
Never take a person canoeing or kayaking if they had a cerebrovascular accident.
They’ll hear the one word they hate the most: “STROKE, STROKE, STROKE!”
What do you call an alligator that can't get hard? A reptile dysfunction.
Why did the lemon 🍋 go to the doctor 👩⚕️?
Because he had a sour stomach.
Q: What did the deaf, dumb, and blind kid get for Christmas?
A: Leukemia.
So, is a homosexual in a coma a fruit or a vegetable?