Health jokes
Where are fart bombs made?
Old people's arses!
What song is sung when conceiving?
"Let's Get Physical, Physical!"
So if I drink alcohol, you're an alcoholic. But if I drink Fanta, I’m fantastic.
Baal jharne ke upay?
Spinach
Hi, how are you? Busy doing right? I just texted me and my dad and walk home from home and walk home and walk walk home.
Why did the banana go to the doctor? Because she felt peely!
What is black and white and red all over? A newspaper.
Why did the skeleton not go to the dance?
Because he had no BODY to go with!
I took my pony to the vet because I thought he was making a funny noise when he neighed. The vet said everything was okay and he was just a little horse.
I'm okay with giving babies iPads, as long as the baby has anencephaly.
You can't get brain rot if you don't have a brain!
Only if Africans knew about condoms, so many mosquitoes wouldn't die of AIDS.
My cousin is a surgeon.
Last year he botched a surgery he was doing on a patient who happened to be gay. He's being sued for malpractice for turning a fruit into a vegetable.
Q' What's an Alzheimer's victim's favorite type of comedy?
A. I forget.
I bought my fat wheelchair son a treadmill for his birthday, then that big brainless special motherfucker cried over it and threw a fit cuz his fat special ass couldn't get up out of his wheelchair and said for Jesus to raise him up and give him working and movable legs.
Which is more disabling, is it autism or Down syndrome?
Down syndrome sucks!
Why did the ass go to therapy?
It couldn't deal with all the crap.
Shower thought: If everyone had schizophrenia, no one would know we had schizophrenia or know what it is!
Q. What do you call a biracial kid in a vegetative state?
A. A mixed vegetable.
Q. What do you call a rich person who is in a vegetative state?
A. A loaded potato.