Mosquito jokes
What can fly underwater?
A mosquito in a submarine.
What’s the difference between a woman and a mosquito?
A mosquito stops sucking when you slap it.
What do you call a mosquito in your language?
We don't call them, they just come and bite.
God creates a mosquito :)
God: Okay, so make it reeeeally tiny. Like less than half a fly.
Angel: okay... a bug.
God: now give it’s face a sword, but it has a hole so it’s basically a mouth.
Angel: weird... but okay...
God: and give it wings.
Angel: eh, not half bad Go-
God: NOW MAKE IT EAT THE BLOOD OF ALL LIVING ANIMALS AND HUMANS
Angel: *shook* o-okay
God: okay. Now make sure whenever a human is bit it feels the pain of a million suns burning it, making it scratch until it bleeds out.
Angel: .-.
God: and make sure it also transfers diseases through the species. Give ‘em a taste ‘o that! *evil grin*
Angel: *cries*
Angel: *whispers; I’m so sorry..*
"Confucius say, man who has mosquito on balls truly understands nonviolence."
What's a rapper's favorite insect?
Rhy-mosquito.
What’s the difference between a mosquito and a blonde?
The mosquito stops sucking after you slap it.
If only Africa had more mosquito nets, then every year we could save millions of mosquitoes from dying needlessly of AIDS.
Me: What is the difference between your mom and a mosquito?
Friend: Let me guess, they both suck you.
What's the difference between a hooker and a mosquito?
The mosquito stops sucking after you slap it.
What’s the difference between a mosquito and a blonde girl?
One stops sucking when you smack it.
Only if Africa have enough mosquito nets, the mosquitos will not die of AIDS.
What's the difference between a blonde and a mosquito?
A mosquito stops sucking when you slap it.
Only if Africans knew about condoms, so many mosquitoes wouldn't die of AIDS.
When it comes to mosquitoes in Africa, should you feel bad that they're getting AIDS from their victims?
What is the difference between a pornstar and a mosquito?
No one stops sucking.
Say yes if you wanna fuck.
If just Africa had more mosquito nets, millions of innocent mosquitoes could be saved from a horrible death of AIDS.
What do a Make-A-Wish kid and mosquitoes have in common?
They both got a 10% survival rate...
We send millions of mosquito nets to Africa; we can save millions of mosquitoes from dying of AIDS.
What do you get when you cross a mosquito with a mountain climber?
Nothing. You can't cross a vector and a scalar.