Health jokes
A gingerbread man walks into the doctor’s office with a broken arm. He asks the doctor, “Doc, what should I do? My arm is broken!”
The doctor then looks at him and says, “Have you tried icing?”
Knock, knock.
(Who’s there?)
Roger.
(Roger who?)
Roger walks away, silently sobbing, having realized his mother’s Alzheimer’s is getting worse!
Stranger: Do you need hair regrowth products?
Kid: No, my hairline is just far back.
Stranger: Do you need a doctor?
Only if Africa have enough mosquito nets, the mosquitos will not die of AIDS.
I just got my doctor's test results and I'm really upset about it. Turns out, I'm not gonna be a doctor.
What’s the difference between a fetus and a jar of pickles?
The pickles aren’t as tasty in a jar.
Why did the computer catch cold?
It left a window open.
What do you give the dentist of the year? A little plaque.
What’s the first thing you should do if an epileptic is having a seizure in the bathtub?
Throw in your dirty laundry!
What’s better than winning the Paralympics wheelchair race?
Walking.
Hello, which do y'all think is more embarrassing to have, is it autism or Down syndrome?
Leo is more useless than a HEDGEHOG with ALOPECIA.
Hugging Leo is a great way to commit suicide... you’d just drown in all her fatness.
Why did the rapper go to therapy?
To work on his FLOW ISSUES.
Why is yo mama so fat? She follows rap boat's diet.
I'M SOOOO SAD. (I have depression btw)
Your mom is so fat, she starts the alphabet with the letter "o" for obesity, hahaha!
Your mum is so fat she eats all day!
"Ouch!"
"What's wrong?"
"I stepped on a screw."
"Are you ok?"
"I'm in ex-screw-ciating (excruciating) pain!"
Stephen Hawking never used a condom. He used a firewall.