Health jokes
Why did the fish go to the doctor?
Because he was feeling “eel.”
Yo momma so fat, her ankle broke and gravy poured out.
What is saw and bleeding and covered in bruises?
Your mum.
What do Hiroshima and Nagasaki share in common with balls?
They both drop.
What do you call an autistic daughter?
Why are skinny people skinny?
Because he don't have a family to breastfeed on.
What do you call a Barbie doll that’s wearing scrubs?
A plastic surgeon. 😷
What part of a vegetable can’t you eat?
The wheelchair. 😑
Sometime ago I went to the morgue and asked if they took walk-ins.
I pregnoot.
What did the left eye say to the right eye?
POOP!
What's the best thing about Covid-19? It gets into any kid.
Yo momma's so fat that she got married to diabetes!
Joe's pizzeria and abortion clinic.
Yesterday's loss is today's sauce.
Why do women have periods? Because they deserve them!
What will happen if someone kicks you right in the balls?
You will be like, "Ow, my nuts!"
Why was the tamale in the hospital? Because he was a "tamalito."
Where do depressed people go to eat?
Suicide Sonic.
A girl looked in the fridge. She got mad that somebody ate the last ice cream cone. She ran into her sister's room and said, "This is why you're fat!" Then fell down the stairs. Good thing she had that belly roll to save her.
Did you hear about the dyslexic man who walked into a bra?