Health jokes
What do Hiroshima and Nagasaki share in common with balls?
They both drop.
Yo momma so fat, her ankle broke and gravy poured out.
Sometime ago I went to the morgue and asked if they took walk-ins.
What do you call a Barbie doll that’s wearing scrubs?
A plastic surgeon. 😷
Yo momma's so fat that she got married to diabetes!
Joe's pizzeria and abortion clinic.
Yesterday's loss is today's sauce.
What did the left eye say to the right eye?
POOP!
Why do women have periods? Because they deserve them!
Wee dyslexic boy and girl in class.
Wee boy says, "Can you smell gas?"
Wee girl replies, "I canny even smell my name!"
Where do depressed people go to eat?
Suicide Sonic.
What will happen if someone kicks you right in the balls?
You will be like, "Ow, my nuts!"
Why was the tamale in the hospital? Because he was a "tamalito."
I slit my wrists.
Q. What's the difference between my phone battery and an anti-vax kid?
A. Nothing, they both die at ten.
"hvhuhdsjcjdsijdskdsivhdsvhsjdvnsjdvdshvgdshgsdhfgh" That's what my friend said when he gave an EpiPen. I don't know why, though.
I got so bad about cutting myself every time I went to the bathroom, I wanted to break my jacket zipper off and use that!
A girl looked in the fridge. She got mad that somebody ate the last ice cream cone. She ran into her sister's room and said, "This is why you're fat!" Then fell down the stairs. Good thing she had that belly roll to save her.
Did you hear about the dyslexic man who walked into a bra?
What's the best thing about Covid-19? It gets into any kid.
I went to the eye doctor and I couldn't read. They showed me a picture of a birthday cake and I thought it was a menorah!