Kick Jokes


A man gats kicked out of police camp after writing “Who’s that Pokémon” next to all of the chalk outlines

in Dark Humor

I kicked a soccer ball at the kid in the wheelchair Now we’re playing rocket league

in Emo

Why did the emo kid get kicked out of the amusement park?

He kept cutting in line.


I got kicked out of a hospital once, I told all the COVID patients to stay positive.

Joe Mamma
in Wrong

i got kicked out of the hospital cause i told all the Covid-19 patents to stay positive.


I am still trying to figure out why paying the covid doctors a complement is so offensive. They even kicked me out and all I said was to stay positive…

9/11 jokes are my favorite

Me: want to play 911

My little brother: what’s that

Me: It’s where i kick your legs and you fall


How do you win an argument against a emo? kick the chair.


I got in big trouble the other day, though it was pretty unfair. Babies kick pregnant women all the time, and yet I got arrested anyways.

in Bullying

I came home from school One day and told my cat a kid at school said I was an idiot and told me to go kick rocks so I did except I kicked him out him and I called him the idiot for not moving out of the way


The person who made it a law to not hurt girls is stupid because we’ve all kicked a pregnant woman before we where even born.

in Emo

How do win an argument against an emo? Kick the chair!

in Orphan

What story does an orphan always get kicked out of?

Home Depot


How do you give a redneck a circumcision? Kick his sister in the jaw.

John Doe
in Puns

I still remember the last words my grandpa said before he kicked the bucket. He said, “Hey, how far do you think I can kick this bucket?”


How do you circumsize a hillbilly?

Kick his mother in the jaw

Zachary Beerbower

Me: Wanna play 9/11? Friend: What’s that? Me: Its a game where I kick you in both legs and watch you fall.


I got kicked out of the school library for placing a women’s rights book in the fiction section

Bill Nye is hot
in Child

Dream tweeted, and I quote “Babies kick pregnant women all the time but I do it one time and I’m the one arrested.”