EpiPen jokes

Son: I heard mom got stung by a few bees this morning. Is she ok? Hospital?

Dad: She's ok now, no hospital.

Dad: She had to take the deep penis.

Son: Umm...... WHAT!?

Dad: I had to inject her with and EPIC PENIS.

Dad: Oh, for God's sakes.

Dad: Epi Pen.

I have an EpiPen.

My friend gave it to me when he was dying.

It seemed really important to him that I have it.

My friend died from an allergic reaction. He gave me an EpiPen while he was dying, so now I have something to remember him from.

My friend had an allergic reaction after he ate a peanut.

We got his EpiPen to help him when Penaldo appeared because he heard the word "PEN". He tried stealing the pen, but I said, "No pens for you," and "Brentford". He cried and ran away. Shame on you, Penaldo the fraud!

Q: What do pedophiles use for allergic reactions?

A: An Epstein pen.

Somebody give me a peanut. I just ate an EpiPen.

"hvhuhdsjcjdsijdskdsivhdsvhsjdvnsjdvdshvgdshgsdhfgh" That's what my friend said when he gave an EpiPen. I don't know why, though.

I cannot moderate myself at all. It's either I don't take my meds, or I take the entire bottle. Decisions, decisions...