Patient: Oh doctor, I’m just so nervous. This is my first operation. Doctor: Don’t worry. Mine too.
a surgeon loses his job as he botched a surgery
boss: "we have to let you go."
surgeon: "I protest innocence."
boss: "how?"
surgeon: "I thought to do your job and saving people's lives were two different things."
boss: "get out"
What's the difference between a surgeon and God?
God knows he's not a surgeon.
Operation failed in North Korea, the surgeon died.
What do you call a Barbie doll that’s wearing scrubs? A plastic surgeon 😷
What did the Emo say to the surgeon ? "cut me please"
I was talking to this absolutely gorgeous woman, and I asked her, “what do you do?” And she said, “I’m a brain surgeon.” And I don’t know if this makes me sexist or not, but I was really impressed. Most women can’t pull off sarcasm
My boss doctor said that we are getting a surgent coming in tomorrow im super excited to work with him the next day we had to do our first ever open hart surgery so me and the surgeon spent many hours on this patient so we finished the surgery and went out side for a smoke and we were talking I said why did you keep the patients blood on your glove? He replied we in my free time I test it for anything diseases HIV the next day I got invited to his house and we had some drinks I said this is amazing red tea what is in it just the 2000 people you have cut opened .
Q: What is the worst thing to hear your surgeon say?
A: Oops I dropped my lollipop.
What's the most difficult about being a paediatric surgeon?
Keeping the scalpel steady while masturbating.
Do you think the founder of Dunlop was a retired tree surgeon or a hairdresser?