Spastic jokes

I'm doing a charity bungee jump for the local disabled.

It's called "spastics on elastics."

I did a bungee jump for charity recently. It was called "spastics on elastics."

I decided to make a charity bungee jump for the local disabled. It's called "Spastics on Elastics."

They call me Mr. Distracted, truly a spastic. Can't talk to my folks cause they say I'm pro- problematic. Really fantastic. Can't focus unless I take meds then it's magic. My brain is like traffic, always fucking active. But never at the right time, pretty fucking tragic it happens.

"Rueben Glover is a Steven Hawking spastic."

"SpaStics on aplastic. Add me on ps4 SpaZZagaZZa54."

On one hand he was fantastic and the other a spastic. You could say he was a fantastic spastic.

My family loves to have dance parties. My dad will just play music from his iPod, and I'll go to the light switch and make a nice strobe light effect. Everyone loves it, especially my younger cousin. He gets down on the floor and starts breakdancing! It makes him so happy, and he needs that extra joy in his life, especially since the doctor recently diagnosed him with epilepsy.

Never buy an epileptic kid light-up Sketchers.

I parked in a disabled space today...

...and a traffic warden shouted to me, “Oi, what's your disability?” I said “Tourettes! Now fuck off!”