Great jokes
Teacher: "Kids, what does the chicken give you?"
Student: "Meat!"
Teacher: "Very good! Now what does the pig give you?"
Student: "Bacon!"
Teacher: "Great! And what does the fat cow give you?"
Student: "Homework!"
Grove Christian School is a great school in Richmond, Virginia. I recommend that you go there.
My great great grandfather killed Hitler😌
Trump wants people to think he's a great golfer. But the only handicap he has is a mental one.
If I make a great joke, I will pay for it.
I'm great!! I'm good. I'm doing good hahaha. I mean "well" haha! Haha I'm doing well, not good! Haha I'm not doing good! I'm not doing so good.
The only thing longer than the Great Wall of China is your hairline.
Everyone thought I'd have a great year...
14 years just gave me more chances.
Haven't had sex since I got out of jail; although sex in jail wasn't that great, either.
Stephanie has a great thumb!
Why did the ass start a gardening service?
It was great at dropping SEEDS.
Why do asscheeks make great friends?
They always stick together!
True story: In 1986, in the midst of the HIV epidemic, they made condoms available to the public. At that time, me and my boyfriend were 13 years old. My boyfriend was so happy: "These will make great water balloons!" And I was even happier. I did not have to pack a lunch for school tomorrow, lol.
1st graders: Ay yo girl, I think you’re beautiful, let’s get married!!
2nd graders: Uhh, don’t tell my mom that we’re dating!! She won’t let me date! Let’s keep this a seeeeecret heeheehee.
3rd graders: Uh, my teacher told me to stay after school because I wrote a poem about you and I’m 9 years old, we have to break up, sweetie.
4th graders: Hey, I think you’re cute!! Wanna date? I don’t think my girlfriend will mind.......
5th graders (they start wearing makeup): Ay girl, your eyelashes are pretty, I like you now, wanna date? Here’s my numberrrrrr.
6th graders: Heyyyyy, I gotta tell you a secret, I got a crush on you!! Don’t tell anyone!! Byeee, ooh, I’ll text you later!
7th graders: We need to make Peyton jealous because she broke up with you!! Wanna date? I mean, you’re not hot, but still, great personalityyyyy, alright, bye now.
8th graders: Hi sweetheart, I got STARRRBUCKKKSSS
Me: UGLY AF AND LITERALLY NO BOYFRIEND.....
Q: Sex is great, only your mate can sometimes be a little nuts!
(I am still a single young virgin.)
What is a car?
My grandad killed Hitler. He was such a great man!
During the Great War, a man holding a machine gun shoots down a swarm of soldiers running on a swamp.
He says: "You came to the wrong swamp, Americans! You came to the wrong swamp!" *He didn't stop firing.*
And together we will make America great again.
You were never great in the first place.
Lettuce: Tomato, you're doing great!
Tomato: Thanks for the condiment!